Friday, November 27, 2009

Friday Hound Blogging

Frequent reader(s) of this blog know that we sometimes end this phrase with some sort of smart Alec comment. Ha! Got you there, didn't we? You're all thinking that predictable.

Yeah? How you like us now Mr. and Ms. mouths agape in shocked disbelief?

Agape. We like that word. It's one of our favorite words, along with lugubrious.

Where were we? Oh, yeah, frequent readers of this blog know that on the occasion of Friday Hound Blogging we like to make light of the overlords' shall we say, lack of intellectual wattage. This, as you may imagine is not a challenging task.

However, this week we have set the bar substantially higher (insert your own Stoli joke here--we're busy). Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this week we are going to describe for your reading pleasure how a person who is highly educated, experienced and capable can be dumber than an overused cat box. This week we are going to conclusively demonstrate for you that Stephen Gamble, President of Eastern New Mexico University is an idiot.
Several weeks ago, APNM learned of an ill-conceived plan by Eastern New Mexico University (ENMU) to acquire two greyhounds from a now-closed Arizona race track and turn them into live mascots with no permanent home. APNM is joining what is a nationwide debate over ENMU’s inhumane proposal to use the two dogs as campus mascots, and to keep them permanently warehoused on campus without long-term and consistent human companionship recommended for domestic dogs.
See, because their sports teams are called the Greyhounds. Get it? They're going to get a couple of greyhound right off the track, stick them somewhere around campus, hope someone will take care of them, then trot them out at football games and such in front of drunk screaming fans to liven up the day.

What could possibly go wrong?
President Gamble told APNM that ENMU plans for a half-million dollar renovation to the grim warehouse building where the dogs will be kept during the day. APNM visited the dim interior warehouse space and found it crowded with tall piles of crates and boxes. Chain link and barbed wire fencing surround what is proposed as the dogs’ daytime back yard; the space is entirely devoid of shade. The enclosed “yard,” reportedly being cleared by backhoe of shards of glass and pottery seeded by the archaeology department for student use, is an otherwise barren plot of packed earth.
OK, is there anyone out there who believes this renovation has anything at all to do with the dogs or there is even the slightest possibility any of their needs were taken into consideration when it was planned? Raise your hand if you do. Didn't think so. Let's recap: We're going to get ourselves a couple of dogs, stick them in a warehouse and hope we can get somebody to look in on them from time to time, then pull them out and make them run around while people scream at them. That about it?

Did we mention President Gamble is an idiot?
President Gamble was unable to tell APNM who the dogs’ trainer would be, what the trainer’s background is, or exactly when or how any caretakers would be trained.
He was also unable to tell APNM how he ties his shoes, how he feeds himself, and how he gets home after work. He was, however, able to describe each of the shiny things he keeps in his desk drawer.
The website of Greyhound Connection, which is supplying the dogs, says that “Separation anxiety may hit Greyhounds harder than some breeds because Greyhounds seem to be more sensitive than most others.”
Right. So here's our question Mr. Greyhound Connection, sir: Why are you even considering letting this Bozo adopt two of your dogs? You got a bet with him about who can be more stupid in less time?

Hey Tootie, what say we all send President Gamble a little note and let him know what we think of his plan. If he gets someone to turn his computer on for him, you can reach him at

Too Tall AKA Tootie is a bit shy and she is learning to trust people. She enjoys pets and is starting to seek attention. She enjoys playing with toys. She has an energetic playful side, which comes out first thing in the morning and when it is time for a walk. She has a very cute face with distinct worry lines. Tootie would do well in a working family home with well-mannered older children, 10 and up. She is good with other dogs, once she gets to know them. Initially she is a bit shy with them. She would probably be fine as an only dog. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here.


Anonymous said...

Mr. Gamble sounds totally unprofesssional and considering he is the President, that is pretty absurd.
When the entire student body is looking for a leader and a scholar and someone to "look up to", what a huge let down to discover the "President" does not have what it takes.
Live animals are live animals and not to be played with like Barbie Dolls. Yes. We do have cheer leaders but they have an option to be stupid, smart or whatever. Greyhounds were not given this option and the "President" should have gotten that idea immediately.
If I was a student at this University, I'd be long gone. After all, what is to be "learned"? What is to be accomplished if the very basic attitude is to "exploit".

Anonymous said...

I did not get a chance to get to the computer because of Thanksgiving...I'd like to go back to Jen, if I may.
She used to be around the Alabama district and now she is showing up around Arizona? Problem is, we never found out about those 3,000 Greyhounds around Alabama that got dumped and slaughtered. Maybe Jen could do not only a "follow up" to see if there have been any other "situations" , but also, maybe she could let us know "why"? And when she figures out the "why", maybe there will be some kind of "enlightenment".
"Enlightenment" like besides the brutality, besides the fraud, besides the organized crime, maybe what all you racing fanatics really got are a whole lot of "contraband". Now, when you figure out the "contraband", you get back to us with your "innuendos" of morsels for "Thanksgiving".

Anonymous said...

The groups providing these two poor, unsuspecting Greyhounds to the university are GPA-AZ in conjunction with Greyhound Connection of New Mexico. Just wanted to be clear about who the players are in this mess.

Anonymous said...

OK Enough with the Jen Krebs! This has got to be a German name. And what has been "brought to light" is the ruthlesssness of "global industries " to make an absolute killing and I do mean killing on sales of copper. You've already heard about "copper units"; "copper tunes"; and what I am being told about is that it concerns spark plugs. Imagine that. Spark plugs! Something so mundane and common and usable like peroxide or even bleach that the oil goons are pushing it and all over the map. (GLOBAL)
Well there is a website about "power usa" and let's not forget how "powerful" it can really swing into being engineered by not only making bombs with spark plugs but throwing in the name of God for an even bigger bang for your buck.
Jen Krebs and Arizona? Well, we certainly have your number. You'll get a call. We hope you are "ready".

Anonymous said...

Seriously, if Jen Krebs is indeed a mole, is that scary or what? What is Ironicus Maximus thinking?
However, we also do know IM is the bees knees for "undercover" and he is no fool when it comes to facts.
But the last time I laughed when I heard a name and its description was with Marena Riggins. You know, somebody said it had a "bounce". Now, Jen Krebs....kind of German? Kind of tough sounding? But what I really loved was her photo. Amazing what people can do to hide their "flaws" and enhance their "assets". Hollywood knows all about that. Don't you worry.
"Stay tuned".
As in copper.

Jen Krebs said...

Regarding the ENMU situation, the university is making a huge mistake and the dogs will suffer the most. Thanks to IM for bringing this to the forefront.

In response to the Anonymouses, I am really confused about who you seem to think I am.

I have nothing to do with greyhound racing - never have, never will.

I've never lived in Alabama, or in Arizona.

I spent 5 years supporting greyhound adoption, and the past year working to end greyhound racing.

So, really, you’re barking up the wrong tree.
No moles here.
I’m sure IM has done the homework, unlike yourselves.

But hey, I’m glad my name is ‘kind of tough sounding’.

Oh, and thanks for the kind comments about my picture! I am SO glad I managed to hide my flaws.

Anonymous said...

Listen, everybody"s nerves are quite gone with all this talk about bombs, and Global and copper . It is a horrible "regime" that pushes the executions and total destruction of such a sensitive and beautiful dog.
We have all been put through enough emotional pain to last forever and perhaps some of us are beginning to show the strain. But let's not forget what has already been uncovered and internationally. This is not imaginary. It is an ongoing, horrific "business" to simply utilize a hound for monetary gain and even worse, political upheaval and destruction.
Jen may or may not be who she is. We have seen this endlessly happening in the Racing Industries. It is all a heartless fraud and extremely powerful with organized crime. World Wide. So, perhaps Jen may be real or not makes little difference as she is just a miniscule part of a very sophisticated scheme. And thank God, real citizens , connected to underground workings and information, have cracked that bad nut wide open.
Hollywood you all say?
Count on it.

Anonymous said...

Stephen Gamble? What more can a name even say!
This jerk who is "President" of this particular University should be fired and pronto.
A "President" is supposed to be wise and a leader and progressive to just name a few. This guy sounds like a big boobed cheerleader with about as much on the "mind". Perhaps some of the students could get together and show the torture of these hounds in the racing circles and underline "exploitation" just to help the "President" get the idea. These dogs have been put through utter hell and for a "President" to put them through more by propping them up as "mascots", screams dumb and evil.
Unless, of course, he never understood their plight at all. In which case, give him a pom pom and a horn.

Anonymous said...

GPA - Arizona and Greyhound Connection are the two organizations that need to be slapped for this. They are supposed to understand their pain! For them to continue it by giving Stephen Gamble these two sweet Greyhounds to parade around as their "mascots" shows they are not at all serious about their supposed responsibilities to this breed and their outcome.
And what does this say for those people connected to those two organizations?
They are merely a "joke".