Monday, March 09, 2009

Welcome To Oklahoma. Don't Forget To Keep Breathing

Frequent readers of this blog often wonder if they are successful in an alternate universe...erm...we mean will remember our previous visit to Oklahoma (Motto: Don't Eat Dirt) when there was a bill before the legislature outlawing homework. Not content to merely guarantee that students from their state would single handedly pull down the nation's literacy rate to a tie with Togo, the same legislature has recently passed a resolution outlawing...Richard Dawkins?

OK we have a theory. If you look at a map you'll see that Oklahoma is about in the center of the country. We think that because of some geologic or meteorological combination of factors, (or perhaps the fact they are sandwiched between Texas and Kansas) Oklahoma has become a sort of black hole. A black hole of stupid, and like celestial black holes draw matter and even light into themselves, Oklahoma is sucking the stupid out of the rest of the county and collecting it somehow. And concentrating it.

Now, while this may be good for the rest of the country as the overall level of stupid is reduced from what would be the non-Oklahoma levels, it can't be good for the people living there. Look at their governor. He looks like Steve Martin with walnuts in his cheeks. And then there's senator Inhofe who said global warming was "the second greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people after the separation of church and state."

All righty then. Well, there are two senators for Oklahoma, maybe the other one has his meds better balanced. What do you see as the big issue of the day senator Coburn?

Tom Coburn, thinks there's a lesbian epidemic in Oklahoma school bathrooms.

Yes. And these guys spend a good portion of their time out of the state away from the stupid waves. So here's our question: Why the heck would Richard Dawkins want to go to Oklahoma in the first place? His IQ probably dropped 20 points as soon as his plane landed.


Anonymous said...

Isolation breeds stupidity, period. (North Korea, Vatican, etc)
Coburn is intimidated by all the intellectual gays, or not, producing facts about HIV, homosexuals,'s a losing battle for the dummy GOP's, obsessed with abstinence rings , "just say no", and no condoms in schools, etc.
Is it any wonder USA is the most ignorant of all Western countries, proclaiming the worst wave of teenage pregnancies, ever.
Karl Rove was involved in the "science" panels and he held no degrees or diplomas with anything but perhaps personal knowledge of bisexuality. This alone, is one of the main causes of AIDS in USA, and Rove has a definite monkey on his back. Just think: Bush can slap Laura on her bottom and smirk, but poor Karl is frustrated with no guy to whack.
Please make it lawful for all "boys" to go to their washrooms, particularly in airports because we need the FBI to investigate all the Republican 's heavy , torture, wiretapping and bribery crap!
WMD is the heaviest of "petting". Masturbation is so innocent, even the Pope recommends it! Time to just drop all the extreme right in Afghanistan. The Taliban and those idiots have a lot in common.

Anonymous said...

This is the kind of place Sarah Palin thinks breeds "real Americans."
Watch out 2012! We can get lower and stupider, yet.