Friday Hound Blogging

A couple of weeks ago we told you about Overlord Dale Popp who is the General Manager of Tucson Death Camp for Greyhounds. As you may recall they were having a bit of an inventory problem.

Dogs at Tucson Greyhound Park typically race on at three days’ rest. About three dozen greyhounds have not raced at TGP in at least six weeks, including three that haven’t raced since February.

It seems the disappearance of almost 40 dogs attracted the attention of several animal rights whackos who alerted the local media. Said media then proceeded to get all up in Dale's grill and were like Dude, where's the dogs? Can we see the dogs? Bring out the dogs.

Now, you probably think because of the long history and tradition of transparency at TGP that overlord Popp brought out the dogs, let the reporters check them over, gave a tour of the kennels and everyone went home with a smile on their faces--except of course for the animal rights whackos who were shown once again to be more concerned with casting aspersions on the character of the overlords by spreading lies about their commitment to the units than about the units themselves.

Well, that just shows how little you know about the wholesale commodification and meaningless death and injury helpless, innocent living creatures are subjected to in the pursuit of (no) profit because not only did overlord Popp refuse to produce the dogs, he wasn't about to let them crazy reporters with all that video equipment anywhere near the kennels. Although, in his defense, he did respond to their allegations.

Popp said at the time, “The dogs aren't unaccounted for. They are accounted for.”

Not only that, he enlisted the aid of overlord Alicia Heiserer for confirmation.

TGP controller Alicia Heiserer emailed us, saying, "...it seems as if you really think something is up with the dogs that you had listed to Mr. Popp. Fortunately, we know the whereabouts of each one of them and they are just fine."   

So, case closed, right? Umm...not quite. It seems the overlords'  definitions of "accounted for"  and "just fine" are a little different from everyone else's.

Turns out, not all the dogs are fine; one of them is dead. That would be "Last Two Stars." The Feb. 21 race was her last. She died the next day of a twisted gut, and was cremated. She was two and a half years old.

 OK, before you get all up on your high horse in the overlord's defense, they knew she was dead so technically she was accounted for and her crate has been filled by another greyhound so in that regard things are just fine.

During the July 11th interview, Popp replied to our list with what TGP said was the status of all the inactive dogs. It showed “Last Two Stars” was petted-out, meaning adopted.  But when we asked the Arizona Department of Gaming to confirm that, a spokesman said "Last Two Stars" was in fact dead.

Hey, no system is perfect, you know? Probably someone just checked the wrong box.

Popp said, “That piece of information wasn't obviously, wasn't accurate. “Last Two Stars”, and “Xtrem Stars” were inverted. “Xtrem Stars” is the one that was petted-out. “Last Two Stars”, um, had a twisted gut, and has, uh, been, was, has deceased.”

Well there you go then. Simple case of mistaken identity. Happens all the time, besides all greyhounds look alike to him, right overlord Popp?

We asked Popp, “Isn't that a huge mistake to make, though? That you as the general manager didn't know a dog was dead here?” He replied, “Any mistake is huge when it comes to the safety and well-being of the dog.  Am I surprised that I didn't know? Yeah.”

Popp also admitted that he was surprised when he found his way home after work without stopping to ask for directions, when he got his shoes tied in less than three tries and when he remembered which end of the toothbrush to stick in his mouth.

Randell Graham is a greyhound owner and trainer at TGP, the only one to come forward so far to respond to our first report. Graham had three dogs on the inactive list, and showed us their tattoo numbers, which matched those on the list. Graham said, “When we try to lay them up and give them a rest, we're accused of making them disappear, or they're missing, and it's, in my opinion it's become a double standard. And I wanted to clear my name.”

Good for you overlord Graham, but we're not quite sure what you mean by double standard. Lying about the welfare of the dogs, hiding their true condition and refusing to let independent observers verify what you are saying seems to be the only standard.

Regarding the fact that Popp told us two weeks ago that “Last Two Stars” was adopted, when she had been dead since February, we asked Popp, “Going forward, do you intend to get to the bottom of this?” He said, “Of course I do.” We asked, “How?” He replied, “By doing exactly what you're doing. Asking questions and investigating.”

Yeah. OK, but if your definitions of asking questions and investigating are like your definitions of accounted for and just fine, we've got a bad feeling about this. What about you Daisy? You going to sleep any better knowing Popp is on the case?

This sweet girl is with a rescue group called Alex’s House, who asked if we could please cross post her info. If you are interested in her, please contact them at: 316-321-1597.We don't know if Daisy can live with cats or small dogs, or if she can be an "only dog. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

OK, it's pop quiz time here in the marbled halls of IM Central. Complete this sentence:

In the future, the state’s thoroughbred and greyhound racing industries could feature:

Here are your choices:

A. Lectures by Veterinarians on the physical harm that can occur to racing animals.

B. A chapter of Gamblers Anonymous.

C. Workshops on the ethical aspects of commodifying sentient living creatures solely for profit.

D. Career counseling for the overlords.

Done? OK let's see what you picked.

Off-track betting at upscale sports bars and, perhaps, country clubs around the state.

Racetrack-sponsored social gaming sites with prizes, such as free hotel
accommodations, redeemable at the racetracks.

More flexibility for the state Racing Commission to reduce or increase racing days at the state’s four tracks, based on fluctuations in purse fund revenues.

Legalized sports betting at the racetracks.

 Hmmm...not quite what we were looking for, but we see your point. Anything that takes the emphasis away from racing is likely to help racing. You might be on to something here. Care to elaborate Racing Commissioner Bill Phillips?

“What it points out to me is people in this industry are willing to sit down and work together to stimulate and grow the industry,” he said Tuesday, after subcommittees presented their ideas for revamping racing in the state.

Gotcha. So the thing to do to stimulate and grow the industry is to give people things to do other than watch innocent animals risk life and limb for losers betting the rent money. Sounds like a plan.

Proposals for economic growth and revenue enhancement ranged from the more conventional -- such as advanced deposit wagering, which allows players to set up accounts so they can place wagers from their smartphones or tablets – to the extreme of legalizing sports betting at the racetracks. It  was brought up as something that obviously would be a game-changer,” Erich Zimny, vice president of racing operations at Charles Town Races, said of the latter. “How realistic that is, is another question.”

Oh we're with you there, Mr. Zimmy. Anyone dumb enough to think they are going to make money betting on whether an animal will get around the track without killing or injuring itself is probably not going to be too adept at operating a smart phone or a tablet. In fact, if they even have a tablet it's probably the kind the doctor prescribed for them, you know...so they'd stop hearing the voices. Besides, even Sam Burdette figured out that losers bet and bettors lose and he's not exactly Stephen Hawking's long lost brother, know what we're saying?

Phil Reale, who lobbies for both thoroughbred and greyhound owners, suggested that OTB would work well in sports bars and country clubs. “Upscale sports bars are an absolute home run,” he said, adding, “It’s the kind of clientele you’re looking for.”

Well, we can certainly understand that Mr. Reale, but we have to say upscale and the wholesale exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit are not ideas that are usually connected. And country clubs? Seriously? "Jerry, here are my keys. Pull the Mercedes around while I bet two bucks on some poor, helpless dog in Florida will you? I'm meeting with my broker at two."

We're just not seeing it.

Also suggested were racetrack-sponsored social gaming sites, with winning prizes redeemable at the racetracks, as a way to entice Millennials to visit the facilities.

 OK we can see that, but what kind of prize would you offer? It's not exactly like you're in a position to be giving away cars and stuff. Oh we know! How about something like the collar from a dog that electrocuted itself during a race. It's not going to cost anything and it might make a nice memento for whomever bet on the deceased unit.

Among marketing and advertising proposals was a suggestion to promote racetrack casinos not only as entertainment venues, but also as major employers and economic engines in their regions.

Hey, we like that. We can see it now...billboards all around the state: "Visit your local race track so the poor schmucks who work the minimum wage no benefit jobs don't have to go on welfare." That's bound to bring them in, right Sue?

I am very puppyish and have a lot of energy for being almost three years old. I am curious about everything as it is all new to me. I love to follow my foster parents around and I like to see what they are doing. I love to look at myself in the mirror and see how beautiful I am. I do a little “happy dance” when my foster parents get home.

I learned how to go up and down the stairs my first day in my foster home. I am housebroken. I need some work learning how to walk on a leash. I get along with dogs of all sizes. I have loved all of the new people I have met. I am learning how to play with toys. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

We're coming to you today from the Out Of Sight Out Of Mind Department here in the marbled halls of IM Central. The OOSOOMD is a division of the Dogs? What Dogs? Company, a wholly owned subsidiary of  Oh, You Mean Those Dogs, Incorporated.

It seems the overlords at Tucson Death Camp for Greyhounds are having a bit of an inventory problem.

Dogs at Tucson Greyhound Park typically race on at three days’ rest. About three dozen greyhounds have not raced at TGP in at least six weeks, including three that haven’t raced since February. Some greyhound advocates are  worried about the condition and whereabouts of these dogs. The track says nothing is wrong.

Well of course there's nothing wrong. Dogs disappear from Tucson Death Camp for Greyhounds all the time. Jeez, if you were to send a reporter out to the track every time a dog went missing, you'd have to put that person on the track payroll because he or she would be there so much. Besides, this isn't anything to concern yourself with is it General Manager Dale Popp?

“The dogs aren't unaccounted for. They are accounted for.”

There you go then. Right from the horse's...um...mouth. And you can bet if Mr. Popp says it, it is true because he has that long tradition of transparency and honesty that is the hallmark of TGP to uphold.

Popp said the vast majority of the greyhounds in question, more than 30, are simply resting in their kennels at the track, mainly due to poor finishes. Dogs that don't finish in at least 4th place in six straight races must be rested, or "re-schooled." Popp says most of the others were "petted-out", meaning adopted.

See, it is a common misconception that units that are no longer profitable are dumped faster than you can say Donald Trump espouses logically cogent, sophisticated policies, if you could say that without your head exploding. Those truly knowledgeable concerning the wholesale exploitation and wanton cruelty that results from putting innocent living creatures in danger of death and injury in the heartless pursuit of (no) profit are aware that dogs who are not able to finish in the money are withdrawn from competition until they can become suitably rested and be examined to ensure there is no medical reason for their performance because they are highly prized professional athletes who represent a huge investment of time and money on the part of the overlords and that investment will be protected at all costs. Just ask Ursulla O'Donnell, or  Ronnie Williams. Well, Ron is still in jail so he might be a bit hard to reach. Maybe Frank Ritt and Bruno Steinmann will be available instead. They got out a while back.

We asked Popp, “If the conditions are good back there (in the kennels), and the dogs are not injured, and they're well-treated, why can't you let our camera back there to show that to the public?” He replied, “Because I don't trust the portrayal of the media.”

Ha! You slippery media types aren't going to get one by Dale Popp, nosiree. He didn't just fall off the turnip truck. You want to go back there and film the injured and sick dogs stuck in their crates, the unsanitary conditions and the general lack of care and compassion greyhounds get in the kennels, then you're going to go out and put that on your TV machine for everyone to see and give all the people the wrong idea about greyhound racing. Well, not on his watch you're not!

Popp added, “It's not unusual to give dogs a rest even if you can't find anything wrong with them, just to give 'em a rest.” We asked, “For six weeks or longer?” He said, “That might be a little bit extreme. So maybe a six-week dog, maybe he is injured.” We replied, “But the only way to know how severe, if at all severe, these dogs are injured, is for you to show them to us.” He said, “No, no.”

Sweet Jebus on rye with mayo will you people get down off your verification high horse? The man just told you everything is fine and you want proof? What more proof do you need? Why would he lie? What could he possibly gain by trying to hide the institutionalized brutality that results from the callous comodification of helpless greyhounds from public scrutiny?

Karyn Zoldan, a greyhound advocate who has adopted dogs that used to race at TGP says, “They're not on the injury reports and they're not on the sign-out sheets, so where are they?” Sign-out sheets, also called "disposition reports," are required to be filled out whenever a dog leaves the track. We asked Popp if he had the sign-out sheets; he said he did. We asked if he would give them to us. He said, “Actually, “I just turned them over to the state.”

Now, we know what you're thinking and before you get all up on your high horse we'll tell you that Popp is not required to keep copies of the disposition reports, so no, he can't show them to you. Besides, even if he wanted to make copies, the secretary was out that day and who knows how to run that copy machine? We mean really, have you looked at that thing? Has more buttons and lights than the space shuttle.

However, Arizona Department of Gaming spokesman Greg Stiles told the News 4 Tucson Investigators in an email, “The state does not have copies of the disposition reports as they are the responsibility of the track."

 In a followup e-mail Mr. Stiles wrote: Christ, is that place still open? I thought it closed years ago. What a hellhole. I wouldn't send an inspector out there on a bet. Who knows what diseases they'd come back with."

We said to Popp, “The average viewer here might be thinking, 'Why doesn't he show the dogs if he has nothing to hide?” He replied, “The average viewer, and if it's not a special interest group or a member of the media, right now, again, this is my opinion, the average viewer, is welcome back there.”

There you go. You heard the man. Call your friends and relatives. It's Road Trip Time, right Aladdin? Well as soon as the cast comes off. Get that while you were "resting" did ya?

This sweet, two year old boy is new to us, so we will have more information about him soon. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Ah, vacation. That blessed time of the year when, instead of being at work thinking about being some place else, you are some place else thinking about all you'll have to do when you get back to work. And so it has been with your friends here at IM Central. We won't bore you with the details except to say all the charges have been dropped and the damage repaired.

So, back to business, and as you know that business is shining the light of truth in the dark corners of the vile and tangled swamp which is home to the overlords and seeing what scurries away. And what better place to watch overlords scurry than Tucson Death Camp for Greyhounds where it seems people with souls have noticed the number of injured greyhounds being dumped on them by the track has taken a dramatic rise. Why it's almost as if the wholesale exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit has led to putting the desperate grasping for the few remaining dollars above the safety and well being of the units. We, of course, know this cannot be true as the overlords have told us on many occasions about the depth of their commitment and the lengths they will go to see that the dogs are well cared for, right general manager of Tucson Greyhound Park?

Dale Popp said he wanted to set the record straight, after animal advocacy groups cited concerns about mistreatment of greyhounds at the race track.

 Well of course he does. Honesty and transparency have long been hallmarks of the way overlords interact with those who question their priorities. Especially at Tucson. So enlighten us Mr. Popp.

Popp said he takes the welfare of the dogs seriously.

Ah. Well, thanks for clearing that up. Glad to know you're on top of this.

In the past few weeks, rescue groups have taken in 28 greyhounds, 24 of which were former racing dogs, with injuries ranging from broken legs to heat stroke. The groups have already spent more than $30,000 to treat the dogs, and volunteers estimated the cost to exceed $100,000 this year.

Hmmm...so when you say you take the welfare of the dogs seriously you mean unless it costs you money then it's, there's the gate Fido, limp your scrawny butt on out of here if you can't earn your keep.

Popp said greyhound racing may be a business, but workers at the park love their dogs too. "There are some very hard working people behind the scenes to take care of these dogs," Popp said.

No kidding? So where are those hard working people when a dog gets hurt? Oh wait, we know. They're the ones who cart therm over to the fence and dump them on the rescue groups right? Greyhounds can weigh 70 or 80 pounds each so when you have to cart that many to the used up pile that can get to your back, you know? Guess that's what makes it hard work.

Popp said kennel owners who brought in the race dogs were very passionate about the sport. Many of them had nicknames for the dogs and brought them treats regularly.

Aw. That's really cute. So when the owner is standing at the rail watching the dog race he can say, "Oh look, Flopsy broke his leg. What a shame. Well, clean out his crate and call the breeding farm. We still got three more races to get through." Touching. Really touching.

Before every race every dog undergoes a medical examination.

So if it has a broken leg, or has been electrocuted before the race you'll know it right away. Good thinking. Safety first we always say.

"Everything we do is monitored by the state," he said. "Not just that, they also do surprise kennel inspections."

Yeah. Except your state monitor is Rory Goree. The man is about as useful as a pitching coach on a T-ball team.

Staff members said the first few inches of the track is soft fluff so dogs don't injure their paws.

Got it, but legs, backs, necks, spines, inability to tolerate large voltages coursing through their bodies...mmm...not so much. Lucky you got out with all your parts still working, huh Dusty?

I am a young girl, just turning two in August. I am sweet, gentle and very friendly. My foster mom says I am very good. I am playful. I am housebroken. I love other dogs. I have loved all the kids I have meet so far. I can go up small flights of stairs but have not tried long flights yet. I love to go for walks and play with toys. I am just a little jumpy at unexpected noises but I have only been off the racetrack a week so I will get used to things. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Frequent reader(s) of this blog know that the dawn of a new day is but a temporary respite from the growing shadows of disappointment that announce the long night of despair...erm...we.mean know that we have frequently used our pixels to point out the overlords' attempts to defend the heartless commodification of innocent living creatures for (no) profit often border on the delusional and occasionally descend into outright fantasy. We're not sure if this is due to some genetic anomaly that causes them to appear to be normal humans and yet have an emotional life more akin to tarantulas, or if they are the result of some sort of shortcoming in their upbringing---perhaps a vitamin deficiency, or lack of proper prenatal medical care. Of course there is always the possibility of alien abduction and during the experiments the part of their brain that gives them sympathy, empathy and compassion was cauterized. We're just spit balling here.

Whatever. This week we thought as a public service to our overlord friends out there--at least the ones who can read--we would reduce the whole complicated, multifaceted, layered issue of exploiting living, breathing, sentient creatures for monetary enrichment (or more realistically the fantasy of monetary enrichment) down to its bedrock core. We will strip away all of the rationalizations, explanations, justifications, and apologia and focus in on the one element that cuts across all aspects and the one idea that binds each overlord to his and her fellows like dog poop binds to your sneaker.

We speak, of course, of money. Bones, bread, dead presidents, green backs, lettuce, sawbucks, scratch, that long green with a short future. Yes ladies and gentleman, no matter what particular brand of delusional lip flapping an overlord employs to obfuscate and delay the inevitable tide of reality there is one thing they are as clear eyed about as Thea after a visit to the optometrist and that is money.  You have it. They want it, even if it is two bucks at a time, and their hope is that they can ride the backs of hapless greyhounds all the way to the bank.

And, with that as our introduction, we present to you exhibit A (click to embiggify):

Now, you don't have to be Kurt Gödel to realize that when the line of a graph drops down to the right faster than Bristol Palin drops her drawers that is not a good thing, especially if you are an overlord, and especially if that line is a graphical representation of your financial future. So, to sum up, let's draw our inspiration from that legendary logician, Aristotle who might put it this way:

Overlords race greyhounds to make money

There is no money to be made in racing greyhounds

Overlords need to find another line of work

OK, those of you with souls are probably thinking "Well, that's pretty clear to us. Thanks for pointing that out Ironicus. Can we contribute to a fund somewhere to help overlords buy a subscription to the newspaper so they can get the want ads?"

We appreciate your astute analysis of our evidence, and you are quite welcome, but there is still one obstacle to overcome. You see, while even the overlords can't escape the reality of the approaching economic demise of their cruel and abusive industry, in each of their fevered imaginations they still cling to the chimera that as the money pot dries up they can find a way to cut out their fellow overlords and secure the lion's share for themselves. Hence as long as there is one rube somewhere with at least two bucks, every overlord within earshot is going to think that two bucks belongs to him, or her. The upshot of all this is that the industry will begin to eat itself and that's good news, but the bad news is that as overlords crawl over each other grasping for that last big score, those helpless greyhounds trapped in their death camps will become less and less of a concern. 

We wish we could find a joke in there to lighten the moment, but we can't. All we can say is we're glad you got out when you did Sandman.

I am a very friendly boy. I have been my foster’s shadow. I am active in the morning but then I basically just follow along and do what the other dogs do. I am not hyper. I am very laid back. I absolutely love attention. I don’t mind being in my crate. I am housebroken. I love to play with my squeaky toys. I can go up and down a couple of stairs but have not had the chance to try more than that. I get along great with other dogs. I absolutely love everyone one I meet. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Hey that was fun last week wasn't it? We hadn't heard from the G man in quite a while. Nice to know he's still as...um...how to say this politely...let's just say it's nice to know the space between his ears is as extramundane as it always has been. There are some things in this life that you can count on. Birds gonna fly, fish gonna swim, Rory gonna...well, you get our point.

So anyway, this week let's traipse on over to a popular overlord blog and see what the haps are. The blog is called Grey2K Lies and not because the overlords are obsessed with Grey2K or anything; not because Grey2K scares the pants off of them because they're one of the most effective groups arguing that the overlords should join the labor pool; not because they're constantly reminding the public that  wholesale commodification, resulting in senseless injury and death for innocent living creatures for (no) profit is inhumane, intolerable in an enlightened society and economically unsustainable. Also, their second choice for a title: We're Going To Write A Bunch Of Stuff That Confirms Our Delusions And Makes Us Feel Comfortable Until Reality Breaks Down The Last Of This Imaginary Facade We've Created And Then We'll Act All Surprised And Blame It On Someone Else seemed a bit long.

So what's the topic du jour?

"Rescue"... What is it?

It's one little word that means a lot of different things to a lot of different people.  It is a word that has been used to inflect hurt upon people; it is a word that has been used to describe the process of rehoming animals.  It is a word that generates images of pathetic, abused animals, which then generate hundreds of thousands of dollars in revenue for some group such as HSUS.  It is a word that has been properly used to describe animals taken out of horrific, shocking conditions.  One little word....  so many meanings.

Hmm...OK, animals taken out of horrific, shocking conditions we get, but inflict hurt, generate dollars...not definitions we noticed in our Websters. We sense another agenda at play. Do go on overlord blogger.

In greyhounds, the word "rescue" was introduced to the lexicon to wound people, to hurt and destroy them, to dehumanize them, to place the greyhound racing community in as bad of a light as possible.

Yeah, uh, that's an interesting interpretation and all, but you kind of did that to yourselves there Mr. or Ms. overlord blogger.  Or maybe it's more accurate to say people like this, or this, or this, or this, or this, or events like this or this did it for you, because it wasn't until people with souls began to learn how you used the units and what happened to them when you were done with them that it was determined they needed to be rescued, but we understand that representing the real world is not the goal here, so please continue.

The people who use the word to harm and injure, and to sustain a negative stereotype, are like those who continually refer to our President using his middle name with emphasis purely to create the same negative effect. The majority of people are tragically misinformed about greyhounds. In today's racing/adoption model, there is no coercion. People willingly give their greyhounds to adoption groups who willingly see to their rehoming.

Yeah, except no: "I'll never let one of my dogs be adopted be an anti-racing group..."And as long as we're engaging in a little etymology here, about that word rehoming. How can you be rehomed when you ain't had no home to begin with? See, Mr. Webster defines home as "the place where one lives permanently, especially as a member of a family or household." Now, since you dump slow greyhounds faster than Scott Walker dumps positions, and since greyhounds are in no way members of your family (unless you abandon your relatives when they're no longer of any use to you) there is no home for them to leave in the first place, hence rehoming is not the word you are looking for. Inventory reduction fits the bill better, don't you think? Glad we could help.

Yet, when people use the term "rescue" it gives the impression that the racing industry had has been bad to them. However, there is a BIG difference between a dog that came off of a track to a dog wandering the streets.... No comparison at all.

Well, that's true. Dogs wandering the street are an unfortunate consequence of irresponsible owners while greyhounds are prisoners in a system of institutionalized cruelty bred only for their market value and deserted when they can no longer perform. So what's your point?

The "rescue" terminology, as it applies to racing greyhounds, is the bludgeon of the demagogue. It is used with malicious intent. It is a slur, a slur applied with a very broad brush, on those who do the right thing to the best of their ability. It is a slap in the face to the greatest majority of decent, hard-working, and dedicated folks who go without so their dogs are given every chance at full life before, during and after racing.

Sure, if they don't get killed on the track, or culled before they even get there, but we get it, overlords have varying degrees of commitment to their dogs, but does that really matter when all overlords, regardless of their personal connection to their charges see them as a means to an end rather than  living, breathing sentient creatures who didn't ask to be put in this situation and simply deserve the right to live out their lives unmolested by your pecuniary desires?

For years now, there is a group of money hungry lobbyists in the US that are trying to do away with dog racing. That group is Grey2K.

Here we go...

They imply that the racing folks don't care and that they are only in it to "make a buck off the backs of the dogs".  They are propagandists and use their misinformation to pull on the heart strings of potential new income sources, enabling a kind of weird higher purpose for those donating.

You know, there's an easy way to disabuse people of the notion you're only in it for the money, pick one of the 39 states that has outlawed betting on greyhounds and open a track there, just for the fun and excitement of the sport don't you know, because that's what it's really all  about right?

Personally, I get pretty darn pissed off about the whole thing.  All those wasted dollars would be better served going to actual adoption groups and/or local shelters.

Oh we're with you there Mr. or Ms. overlord. We're pretty pissed off too because all those wasted dollars going to subsidize your dead industry could be put to better use as well. What's your opinion Tilly?

Tilly can live with cats and small dogs, but we don't yet know if she can be an only dog. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Hey, you know who we haven't heard from in a while? That committed public servant, professional rhetorician, roustabout scientist and friend of the blog overlord Rory Goree that's who. Let's slide over to the coprophagous side of town and see what the old wastrel has been up to shall we?

If I told a story about one of my ex-racing greyhounds, a story that pertained to its racing history, I would have no problem showing anyone my greyhound’s tattoos if they asked to see them. That’s what people with pride in their adopted ex-racing greyhounds do.

Well, if the greyhound in question happened to be there with you of course, but we get it. You're still on about Gina and Grey2K aren't you, but since you are only writing for people who already agree with you there is no need to clearly say what you mean--sort of the passive aggressive approach to opinion writing, right? Or maybe it's just easier for you to take ideas people have already stated, obfuscate them a little and present them as your own deep thoughts. Come to think of it, that's not such a bad strategy for someone whose last original thought was labeling his shoes L and R so he'd remember how to put them on in the morning.

Some like to play the "they are picking on me" game when they themselves perpetuate the picking, bullying and harassment. When questioned, they will not answer honestly, instead they resort to the “they are picking on me” diatribes and side-step providing the simple truth.

Umm...so the answer "it's none of your business" wasn't what you were looking for? And as for bullying, how about this:

"Then grab her and run like hell!!!" That message was followed by a joke about a "get away car."

Sounds like a bit of a threat to us, and as for harassment:

SHOW US THEM TATS! And when you do show them, please be sure an independent person with no connections and nothing to gain or lose verifies this.

Not to be pedantic about it or anything, but the phrase is show us those tats, although the random capitalization is a nice example of the spittle-flecked psychosis that has attended this entire affair. And speaking of psychosis, what is it you hope to achieve by this revelation you so ardently seek in your own obdurate and puerile way?

If a dog was truly an ex-racing greyhound and those who love greyhounds inquire about this dog, why is there a need to hide a dog’s identity, a dog’s history? Why deny this or any greyhound the right to be who it truly is and was?  What is the secret? What is the fear?  Are you afraid the truth negates your fairytale and will expose a long standing pattern of deception which will come out?

Oh, we get it now. You think knowing those numbers would unlock the truth about what people who think the wholesale exploitation and abuse of innocent living creatures for (no) profit is a festering sore on the body of society are really up to, right? Sort of the Rosetta stone of the animal rights wackos; the key to the enigma machine of those who suffer from chronic altruism.

Well, allow us to put what passes for your mind at rest. There is no deep dark secret, no hidden agenda. It's simply that people afflicted with congenital empathy feel obligated to clean up the detritus of your barbaric industry, a detritus that consists of living, breathing, sentient beings.

Think about this G man: the only reason Gina was adopted was because the people who had her didn't want her anymore. Why not? Who has the real secret here? What about you Dew? Anybody ever try to decode your ears?

Are you looking for a care-free girl that can let the wind blow through her ears (check her in a car with a moon roof!) and is still respectable enough to introduce to your mother? An independent girl but still VERY affectionate? A girl with the usual talents, yet also adventurous enough to try new things, such as a cake walk and walking off with the first prize? Beautiful Dew just might be that special lady to add to your life. She is in foster, doing great with house rules, and enjoying her retirement! Come meet this special girl. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

It has recently come to our attention that the overlords are quite upset, and this is very disconcerting to us because we are not the ones causing them to be so. Yes gentle reader(s) in spite of the effort we put into annoying the overlords; regardless of the hard work that goes into creating blog posts in such a way as to constantly point out the intellectual and emotional vacuity it takes to participate in an endeavor that results in the wholesale abuse, injury and death of innocent living creatures for (no) profit; despite the fact that we continually endeavor to remind the overlords that they are to polite society as crotch itch is to a spacewalking astronaut it seems the simple act of rescuing a greyhound from their clammy grasp has done more to send them into a weapons grade tizzy than a whole month of our humble scribbles.

Of course there is the fact that the aforementioned rescue was done by Carey Theil and Christine Dorchak, aka Mr. and Mrs. Grey2K and as we all know, that particular combination of letters and number is the detonator to mega-tonnage of overlord spittle-flecked, bug-eyed, hair pulling, foot stomping, rolling on the floor, demon possessed, ranting and raving. On their more rational days that is. As Mr. Theil  put it in what has to be the very epitome of understatement:

Last month, my family added another member when we adopted Gina the greyhound. Predictably, greyhound breeders responded to this happy event with bitterness and hostility.

Bitterness and hostility? Come on C man. Saying their response was bitter and hostile is like saying setting off a thermonuclear device in the living room will result in stains on the carpet. Take overlord Bruce Walters for example who opined:

"30 days before Ginger decides she wants to jump in front of a moving vehicle."

 Now, set aside for a moment the fact that overlord Walters doesn't have the mental acuity necessary to differentiate between the words Gina and Ginger which may simply be a function of his inability to read the word Grey2K without soiling himself and we can see a fairly good example of overlord logic. In their world, greyhounds trapped in cages up to 22 hours a day, placed in harm's way on a regular basis, fed meat from diseased cows and abandoned at the first sign of slowing down are happy and content, but take them away from all that, place them in a loving home with caring people, feed them well and provide for their comfort and safety and they become suicidal. It makes perfect sense. If the area in your skull where your brain should be is instead occupied by algae.

The overlords are not just complainers though, some, like overlord Beverly Stahlgren Schrecongost are women of action:

"Then grab her and run like hell!!!" That message was followed by a joke about a "get away car." Meanwhile, Daytona Kennel Club worker Connie Winkler suggested that Gina's former racing owner should try to remove her from our family by falsely claiming she was stolen.

First of all, why do so many of the overlords have three names? Is it so that if they forget one they've still got a 50/50 chance of remembering one of the other two?  As you can see though, we have a pretty good example of overlord respect for the law. If they are willing to engage in theft and fraud in matters that do not affect them in any way, what extent are they willing to go to in matters that do impact them, like treatment for an injured dog, or mandatory vaccinations, or seeking help for greyhounds they can no longer afford?

Well, no matter because overlord Craig Randle's comment really gets to the heart of the overlords' concerns, and as you may have guessed if you are literate beyond the second grade, it has nothing to do with the greyhound in question:

As usual, the most disturbing comment was made by former National Greyhound Association official Craig Randle, who again referred to the near fatal accident GREY2K USA President Christine Dorchak suffered in 1992: "Is that dog trolley TRAINed?"

 Now, some of you may see the same tastelessness, lack of empathy and general assholery in overlord Randle's comment as we recently saw in Ted Cruz's joke about Joe Biden right after Beau Biden died, but you would be mistaken in assuming some sort of equivalency. You see, Ted Cruz is just an idiot and sometimes idiots don't self censor as well as they should, but overlord Randle is operating true to form and his comment is typical of the vile, classless and misogynist effluvia that comes out of the mouths of people bereft of human compassion.

We are reminded of a quote from St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals. He said:

If you have men who will exclude any of God's creatures from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with their fellow men.

We don't think the good Saint would disagree if we flipped that statement to make it a little more relevant to the current topic:

If you have men who will exclude their fellow men from the shelter of compassion and pity, you will have men who will deal likewise with  any of God's creatures.

Now ask yourself Condor, if you were one of the greyhounds trapped in the "care" of overlord Randle and he could make a "joke" about what happened to Ms. Dorchak like that, wouldn't you feel a bit of unease every time you saw him walk into the kennel?

I am very playful for my age and love to run and play in the yard. I especially love to fetch the ball. I have a very sweet personality. I get along with dogs of all sizes but no kitties please. I just had my teeth cleaned. I am housebroken. I absolutely love everyone I meet. Could I be the right guy for you? For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Frequent reader(s) of this blog are aware the jauntily colored balloons of youth dancing on their tethers against an azure sky full of hope and promise are now blown away by the harsh winds of age to lie deflated and crumpled under the inexorable tread of time...erm...we mean are aware that on occasion we have been accused of presenting a one sided view of the wholesale commodification and systematized abuse of innocent living creatures for (no) profit...uh...we mean greyhound racing.

Well, we take reader comments very seriously here in the marbled halls of IM Central (no we don't) and we constantly strive to be fair and balanced in our coverage of industrialized cruelty (who are we trying to kid?). Anyway, to counter the perception that we are anti-racing, animal rights wackos (which is actually quite accurate) we present the following interchange between the editorial staff at The Charleston Gazette and the overlords, but first a bit of back story. It seems the editors at the Charleston Gazette were a bit put off by the fact that the state had forgone $29 million so the overlords could stay out of the labor pool and they penned the aforementioned editorial titled Waste: Millions For Greyhounds. Now, the overlords may not be the sharpest knives in the drawer, but even they could tell this was not to be a puff piece on their vocation so they took to the comments to school these clueless upstarts in the finer points of animal exploitation. We present for your edification and intestinal queasiness that discussion. First up, the editors:

Betting on dog racing has almost disappeared in America. So far, 39 states have banned such tracks — mostly because animal-lovers protest that greyhounds spend their lives confined in cramped cages and suffer lethal injuries during wild gallops. Four other states have ceased racing, without prohibitory laws.

Right off the bat overlord Elaine Miller Summerhill takes issue with the blatant falsehood being perpetrated:

What is illegal is betting on LIVE RACING.

 As the kids say, oh snap! Overlord Elaine corrects a common misconception. In those states which the editors so erroneously characterized as having outlawed greyhound racing it is perfectly legal to race greyhounds, it's just that no one can bet on them. We tried to find out if there were any plans to open these bet-free tracks in any of the 39 states, but we were unable to determine if there were any such projects on the drawing board. Back to the editors:

  A few months ago, a West Virginia study ordered by the state Senate showed a colossal downturn: In 1990, gamblers wagered $64 million on dogs at the Cross Lanes track — but the sum dropped below $5 million in 2013. Yet the state gave a $29 million subsidy to dog breeders.

 Well, overlord Jaime Leach Narke (why do overlords always have three names?) is having none of it:

What that article fails to point out, because facts and the truth would get in the way of an agenda, is the money given to greyhound (and horse racing!) breeders DID NOT come from taxpayer money, it came from gambling revenue.

 Well said overlord Jamie. The $29 mill is a handout from the casinos to keep the overlords off the job market. Now, that's not to say that if the casinos didn't have to provide welfare for the overlords that money couldn't go to the state for useful things like roads or education, or public welfare, but let's not get caught up in the details here. The editors again:

The same report said 162 greyhounds were killed by West Virginia racing between 2009 and 2013, while 3,331 were injured. An opposition group, Grey2K USA, examined reports and announced that the Mountain State gave $10.2 million to a handful of breeders over the past two years. The largest subsidy, $1.4 million, went to McMillion Kennel at Alum Creek. Next was $1.2 million to Monroe Racing at Wheeling. Logan’s Tomblin family kennel, which was operated by the governor’s mother until her death, got $580,000.

Sharp eyed readers will note that Grey2K did not do the report, but merely "examined" it. As we all know though, just the mere mention of Grey2K is enough to drive the overlords to dizzying heights of apoplexy. Overlord Jamie again:

I don't think spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on lobbyists and executive salaries a good use of donations when actual adoption groups are struggling to meet their needs. Grey2k is an anti gambling group disguising itself as an animal welfare group.

An overlord  from the Alum Creek Kennel put it a little more succinctly: "They should be in jail." He didn't specify the charge, but as you can see no assertion is made about the veracity of the facts reported, no critique of the report methodology is brought forward, no counter narrative is offered concerning the issue unless you count Grey2K! Argle Bargle Fweet Freet Blek! as a retort.

Finally, overlord Elaine sums the whole thing up:

Who ever submitted this POS editorial doesn't even have the courage to put their name to it.

 We think we can help here overlord Elaine. See, when a newspaper editorial staff writes a position, it's the position of the paper, not any one individual, so traditionally those editorials do not carry a byline because it's assumed the opinions expressed therein represent the views of the staff. Hope we cleared that up for you. It's fun to help people isn't it Banini?

Banini is a six year old female who has just been rescued so we don't know a whole lot about her personality yet. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging (Thursday Edition)

Well, the official start of summer is upon us and it's time to engage in that yearly ritual of glad handing and giving lip service to the men and women who've actually had to pay the price for America using war as an instrument of foreign policy since the end of WW II.Then, on to the important business: Who Wants Barbecue!? Oh, and speaking of WWII, occasionally we'll trot out a veteran of that war to remind ourselves of what we once were, but those folks are leaving us faster than Louis Gohmert leaves Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader. It's all good though since we've been at war for almost 40 of the last 65 years, and it looks like no end is in sight so we'll have homeless Vets to avoid on the street for a long time to come, and that's the real tradition because we've been ignoring our veterans since the Revolutionary War. So the next time Congress votes not to support veterans, don't be mad at them, they're just the latest in a long line of hypocrites, liars and ingrates. It's the American way, after all.

As for us, we're going to be spending the day with some friends who've left various body parts in far flung corners of the world, so we thought we'd wade into the fetid swamp that is home to overlord toads and skinks a day early so the smell has a chance to dissipate a bit before the holiday. And we weren't even ankle deep before we noticed there was great excitement rippling through the turgid waters, as if all the toilets had flushed at once.

This year's live greyhound races in Dubuque started Saturday in front of hundreds at the newly renamed The Iowa Greyhound Park.

 After much discussion the overlords chose Iowa Greyhound Park as the new name because it's the only track in Iowa and their second choice, Oh Crap, Will Somebody Please Come Out Here And Lose The Rent Money So We Don't Have To Get Jobs, was too long to fit on the sign.

The turnout is a sign that dog racing in Dubuque won't fade soon, said one park official. "If it's fading, you're going to have to tell all the people that are standing in line now," said Brian Carpenter, racing director at the park. He said at least 400 people were at the park.

Four hundred people huh? Well, let's see, there are about 60,000 people living in Dubuque, so 400 is about  0.6% of the population or about 1/6 the number of people who attend the Dubuque Fighting Saints hockey games. Oh, and about those lines? Could you point them out to us? We can't see them in this photo:

Maybe all the people who had been sitting in those empty benches got up to go to the restroom at the same time so the lines are over at the Portapotty.

"We're very excited. We're very happy," Carpenter said. "A lot of people didn't think they'd see this day of us reopening, and here we are."

Well said overlord Carpenter. Courage in the face of adversity; tenacity in pursuing your goals; and a $32 million handout from the casinos to get you off their backs. It's the classic rags to riches story, is it not? Well, except wholesale abuse and cruel treatment of innocent living creatures for (no) profit is more a riches to rags story, but let's not quibble over details on such a momentous day.

Carpenter said the Dubuque track will hold fewer scheduled races this year but "little by little" he and others with Iowa Greyhound Association will build up interest in the sport. "We'll have a little bit of a lesser schedule, but we just have to get through this year, and then next year we'll build it back up," Carpenter said. "It'll take a couple of years, but we're trying to work on making a better product."

 Umm...Mr. Carpenter sir? We don't mean to rain on your parade, but haven't you got that backward? We mean, the first year you open is likely to be your best because you attract people who might just come out of curiosity as you are something new, like when a restaurant opens and everyone comes to check it out. After that things tend to drop off a bit, and we have to say, a drop from 400 is not likely to be a long one if you get our drift, so in a "couple of years" you're less likely to be greeting race patrons and more likely to be saying "Welcome to Walmart."

Joe Recker, of Dyersville, Iowa, said he has bred dogs for racing for more than 20 years.  "A very good turnout, very enjoyable for people," Recker said. "I think this is great. I know it was a tough struggle for the Iowa Greyhound Association to get this lined up, but they made it work and I think it's going to be a good deal." Recker said other gambling venues across the region have hurt dog racing, something he said is regrettable. "We've got too much other gambling that hurt us," he said. "If it wasn't for the other gambling, this would still be the top-of-the-line deal."

 Yeah, uh, Mr. Recker sir? If it wasn't for other gambling you'd be the only deal. He seems a little confused don't you think Coil?

I am a very sweet. For being almost four, I’m very puppy like. I am an active boy but not hyper.I love to follow my foster mom and dad through the house. I am a little clingy but I should outgrow that once I have adjusted a little better to being in a home. I get along with dogs my size and smaller dogs but definitely no kitties for me. I am housebroken. I love to play with my squeaky toys and run in the yard. I have already learned how to go up and down the stairs. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Let's see. What fresh hell has descended on the overlords this week? Overlord treating his canine charges to the highest level of care because they represent such a large investment of time and money and thus deserve only the best?

An Austin man is charged with nine counts of animal abuse after finding 14 severely underweight Greyhounds in his care that he was supposed to be training to race.

 Nah, overlord training techniques and care philosophy have been well documented. So it looks like just another week of innocent living creatures trapped in the death camps as an ever dwindling subset of barely sentient swamp lichen strive to avoid gainful labor by subjecting more helpless greyhounds to potential injury and death in the cruel and heartless pursuit of (no) profit. But wait, what's this?

Lawmakers consider folding on West Virginia’s greyhound industry.

Whoa. That can't be good. What's up Mountain Staters?

When Sam Burdette first visited the Tri- State Greyhound Park in Cross Lanes in the mid-1980s, he didn’t even know how to read the program. The sheets of paper were filled with an overwhelming array of fractions and decimals, arranged in almost indecipherable rows and columns.

And now he's the head overlord in the state.  What a success story! What commitment! From barely understanding what the sport of wholesale greyhound abuse was like to becoming its chief spokesman and advocate. We salute you Sammy boy. Tell us more of your journey.

Burdette was a civil engineer, comfortable with crunching numbers. He started keeping a notebook, making hypothetical bets on races based on the handicapping numbers in the program. “Each day I’d tally it up and see if I was ahead or behind. I was approaching it from an analytical standpoint.” The experiment ran for three months. By the end Burdette realized if he had used real money, he would be $200 behind. “I said, well, you can’t buy groceries with that. My object was to take money away from the racetrack, not leave it there,” he says. “To this day, I don’t bet.”

 How inspiring! Wait, what? Sam, are you sure that's the message you want to send? We mean, when the head overlord in the state says the first thing he learned about greyhound racing was it's a scam, that really isn't helping the industry's public image.

Nationwide interest in greyhound racing started declining. In 2001 there were greyhound tracks in 15 states around the country. West Virginia is now one of only seven states that continue to race dogs, and the sport has grown increasingly unpopular in this state as well.

See what we mean? OK, sure the decline is probably more due to the fact that you abuse, injure and kill man's best friend than the rubes figuring out losing the rent money two dollars at a time is not a ticket to riches, but still it can't be helping.

In early 1994 the West Virginia Legislature legalized video lottery terminals—better known as slot machines—at state greyhound tracks. But over time, the slot machines that were supposed to help the greyhound industry began to overtake it. “People switched over from racing to slot machines. They and sit there in a trance and push that button,” Burdette says. He likes to joke—not incorrectly— that it used to take all night to lose $50 at the dog track. With a slot machine, it can take just a few minutes.

Well, Rubes B Rubes Sammy boy, but you gotta give 'em this: They're efficient.

Although it was clear the greyhound racing was suffering, no one had collected the evidence to prove it. So in 2014 the legislature ordered a $68,000 comprehensive study of the industry. The Spectrum report found live wagering on races fell by 55 percent between 2004 and 2013, from $35 million to $15.8 million. Researchers also found the greyhound industry now largely relies on video lottery and table games revenues for its purse awards. The additional revenue still wasn’t enough to stem the decline in purses, however. 

Well sure it sounds bad when you say it like that, but we all know the brutal commodification of defenseless greyhounds for (no) profit is poised for a comeback. Just ask the overlords in Des Moines. Uh, you'll have to leave a message though, they're off begging for another $5 mil on top of the $32 mill they already got so they can open without going into debt for the first week or so.

As surprising as some of the findings were, the report only confirmed what many people—lawmakers, greyhound breeders, and track officials—already knew. “It’s not only decreasing in popularity, it’s dead,” says Danny Adkins, vice president of Mardi Gras’ parent company, Hartman & Tyner, Inc.

Oh Jeez, that's a little harsh don't you think Mr. Adkins? Usually when death comes up in relation to racing we're talking about another dog, not the whole industry.

Burdette says members of his organization are well aware of the state of their industry. “As times change, as technology changes, they have to change their business model. If it’s no longer beneficial to have greyhound racing, fine.”

Oh sure, that's easy for you to say Sammy. You quit pouring your money down that rat hole years ago. What about all the stupid people, what are they going to do? Just take their social security checks and set them on fire? That's no where near as exciting as watching trapped greyhounds flying around a track breaking bones. And what about your fellow overlords? What other career values a skillset that includes lack of empathy, willful ignorance and levels of dishonesty and disconnectedness from reality that rise to sociopathic levels? What's that you say Gunner? Maybe they could get jobs with Comcast?

 

I am like a gigantic puppy. I am very friendly and sweet. I love to get a lot of attention. I love to be petted and cuddled. I am very smart and learn things quickly. I listen well. I love to play with my toys and run in the yard. I get along with dogs my size but no small dogs or kitties either. I am housebroken and I don’t mind being in my crate. I walk well on the leash.  For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

We're coming to you today from the Mixed Messages Department here in the marbled halls of IM Central. The MMD is a division of the WTF Corporation, a wholly owned subsidy of Say Whaaa? LLC. First we direct your attention to this little tidbit that drifted across the intertoobz earlier this week like a dry fart on a calm day.

A racing greyhound from a farm south of Abilene has made a name for himself in the National Greyhound Association’s auction record book. PJ Burninitdown sold for a record $85,000 at an auction for first-time greyhounds Friday.

 Now, our first thought was there's no way an the overlords could come up with $85,000 unless everybody chipped in a buck, so how's this poor dog going to have any kind of a career with that many owners' fingers in the pie? Then we thought, no that can't be right so we checked to see if any banks in the Abilene area had been robbed recently. No luck. Lotto winner? That didn't compute because someone would have to spend a buck on a ticket, then there'd be no way that person could have thrown anything in the pool. Inheritance? Not likely. The only thing passed down from one overlord generation to the next is bad genes. Truly a puzzler. But just as we were struggling to wrap our heads around that idea, this little nugget came along:

For the first time in Mobile Greyhound Park's history, its evening races have been cut.  Races will now only be held 4 times a week, and only from the hours of 3 to PM (sic).  The changes were made to offset a decline that's been seen in dog racing across the country. 

 OK, so the overlords got their hands on some real cash, cash that could have been used to give a whole bunch of them a free ride scholarship plus stipends to Walmart Greeter School, and instead they plunked it down for a dog that pretty soon won't have anywhere to race. Does anyone see the flaw in this plan?

“It was magical,” said Gary Guccione, the association’s executive director. “It just all came together. It was the opposite of the perfect storm. Everything jelled.”

 Well, there's nothing magical about finding stupid overlords there Big G, it's sort of like finding sand on a beach, but since last year's auction took in $14.27 we understand your confusion. Don't you Mattie?

I am still a little puppyish as I am only a little over two years old. I love Frosty Paws for a special treat. I am not shy around people but I am not overly outgoing either. I love to play with my foster brother and sister but I will also entertain myself. I am inquisitive as living in home is very different and wonderful. I am housebroken and do not mind being in my crate. I get along with dogs of any size and kitties too. I love to play with toys. I love the squeaky ones and will squeak them until I “kill” the squeaker. I can go up and down the stairs and easily walk on all types of floor surfaces. I love to go for walks and do great on the leash. I have learned the word “no.” For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Well, let's see. What part of the crumbling facade that the overlords have erected to shield them from the real world is raining down on their pin-like little heads this week? Oh look! The free market is coming to Florida, something the overlords have demanded for a long time, but now that the beast of unfettered competition is about to be loosed upon them they're all like "maybe we didn't think this through." Dude. For reals. Should have talked to the overlords in Des Moines.  Those guys haven't even opened yet and they're already begging for a $5 mill bailout. So what's going on in your little corner of the fetid, decaying fever swamp called greyhound racing?

Rep. Matt Gaetz, R-Shalimar, and Rep. Jared Moskowitz, D-Coral Springs, said it is time for the Legislature to sign off on “decoupling” and allow kennel clubs, like the one in Orange Park, to decide whether to continue racing dogs. “This is about businesses being able to make a decision for themselves,” Moskowitz said. “Florida, for all the talk about free enterprise, for all the talk about liberty, for all the talk about not having government in the way of over-regulating, Florida actually mandates that a business runs its business like it’s 1997.”

"Oh if only we could go back to 1997," Jack Cory, a lobbyist representing greyhound breeders and dog trainers said. "I mean, that was a lousy year too, but since then the bottom has fallen out. Revenues down more then 66%. It's like people don't come to the track anymore, you know?"

Oh we know overlord Cory, we know. Why, to the casual observer it might seem the people with souls have taken a look at the wholesale exploitation and commodification of innocent living creatures for (no) profit and said "You guys need to get a life, we're out of here." Of course since we aren't versed in the ins and outs of the exciting world of greyhound racing (Fun for the whole family--until we kill another dog in front of your kids) we're sure we are misreading the situation. Perhaps since tracks are closing all over the country at a rapidly increasing rate, people just don't know where to go from one week to the next.

Gaetz and Moskowitz were adamant that they aren’t pushing to end greyhound racing all together, but they believe the state should not tell tracks how much racing they have to do.

"We believe the number of races a track does should be determined by the customers, not the state," Gaetz said. "Of course, since the tracks don't have any customers that sort of tells you what the demand is."

Both lawmakers also argued that recent reports about greyhound deaths and injuries make the case that it is an outdated sport that does more harm than good. Collectively, 13 racing tracks in Florida reported 192 deaths between June 2013 and December 2014. Orange Park Kennel Club had the second highest number of deaths at 23 during that period.

"Oh, sure. Shut us down because we kill and injure dogs in a fruitless attempt to stay out of the labor pool," Cory said. "Is that the kind of America you want you children to grow up in?"

Cory said the state regulates dog tracks and most greyhounds don’t run more than twice a week. He said the “decoupling” issue is simply about whether the Legislature will allow dog tracks to convert to casinos without nearby residents’ approval via referendum, as other types of gambling expansion have required. “All of them want to become casinos; they want to do away with pari-mutuels and they want to become casinos,” Cory said.

When asked why track owner were so eager to drop greyhound racing and convert to casinos Cory replied, "Because that's where the money is. These guys are in business to make a profit. You think they want this giant leech of greyhound racing on their necks sucking money away like Dracula on steroids? Wait, did I just say that out loud?"

Umm..we're afraid you did there Mr. Cory sir, but on the bright side it's the most honest comment you've made all week. You agree with that Jett?

Jett is a two year old male who can live with cats and small dogs, and will need a canine companion. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

You know, nothing ticks off the overlords more than when their dirty little secret leaks out into the larger society of fully functioning human beings. And by dirty little secret we of course mean the wholesale exploitation and cruel comodification of innocent living creatures for (no) profit.

But Ironicus, you say, their dirty little secret has been leaking out for years now. In fact we are all teary eyed from that vile stench that has been off gassing from the bilious festering boil that is greyhound racing. This it true astute reader(s) of this blog, but what we are talking about is when some previously non-affiliated organization or business suddenly steps forward and says to the overlords through their actions "you guys are whack and your industry is a barbaric travesty that is an open wound on the soul of humanity!" Or words to that effect. Case in point: Recently the Whole Foods outlet in Arlington Virginia agreed to donate 5% of a day's sales to the Grey2K Education fund.

Now generally the phrase Grey2K by itself is enough to cause overlord apoplexy ( see Iowa, Des Moines, Pg 1 pgh 13) but then you go and add education into the word stream and it's spittle flecked rants all around! Take overlord Deby Guffy for example:

Many retired racing greyhound owners were wanting to comment on this abhorrent, ignorant fundraising participation. Whole Foods - shame on you for deleting their posts . Shame on you for ignoring the facts of the life if a racing greyhound. Educate yourselves by going to greyhoundfacts.org Whole Foods- you owe an apology to millions of retired racing greyhound owners, breeders, trainers and others. We won't forget.

First of all, kudos to overlord Guffy for spelling the word abhorrent correctly. She seems to have a bit more on the ball grammatically than overlord Betty Carlson-Jameson who blurted:

You WILL be losing customers! and (sic) is that not your botom (sic) line?

 *Deep English teacher sigh* Another student sleeping in class the day they talked about modification. On second thought though, since this is a topic that usually comes up around the fourth or fifth grade, perhaps overlord Carlson-Jameson had already left school at that point, having attained all the skills and abilities she would need to pursue a career in animal exploitation. If that's the case, let us be the first to inform you overlord Carlson-Jameson that, aside from the spelling and capitalization errors, the way your sentence is written it is saying that the bottom line of Whole Foods is losing customers. Or, to put it in a form you may find more understandable, Whole Foods WILL lose customers, and that is their botom line. No need to thank us for the clarification. It's what we do.

Now let's get back to overlord Guffy for a moment who entreats us to educate ourselves by visiting a site called greyhound facts. Being curious types here in the marbled halls we took overlord Guffy up on her invite and went to learn some greyhound facts. We learned that greyhounds like to play with toys, which, while we have no doubt is a fact left us wondering about some other, perhaps more relevant facts like how racing greyhounds are fed, how they are injured and killed, and how they are abandoned. Couldn't find those facts. Nosiree. Nowhere to be seen.

Next to hurl a loogie was overlord Lesley Roberts Tierney Ezkovich who suffers from a surfeit of names.

I have an adoption group, a real adoption group in the New Orleans area, set us up with a fundraiser. 

Apparently overlord  Lesley Roberts Tierney Ezkovich etc. and so forth doesn't quite grasp the idea of fund raising. Perhaps it's because she is used to receiving handouts from state coffers and casino profits instead of actually trying to earn her way. You know, when you've been on the dole for as long as the overlords have and you meet someone who actually has to work to get money it can be confusing.

And finally we come to overlord Dee Dee Avila who has learned a thing or two about the world as a result of the fundraiser:

I didn't realize grocery shopping and politics go hand in hand unless food related.

Of course overlord Avila, of course. Why didn't we see that? Grocery shopping is food related. That explains why, during the last presidential election, no matter how carefully we went through the produce section we couldn't find Romney's position on the Middle East problem. Thanks for clearing that up. What about you Smoke? You ever go looking for parimutuel regulations in the canned goods aisle?

Smoke can live with cats and small dogs but we don't yet know if he can be an only dog. For more information about these dogs, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday Hound Blogging

Here we are on the cusp of the second most important christian holiday. Well, the catholics celebrate it too, but you know...fish eaters and stuff. And all that Latin. Who does that? Still, the wine is nice. And the costumes. Brightens up the proceedings, don't you think? Not big fans of the Holy PE though, prefer to take our Jesus sitting down. Where were we? Oh yeah, the death and resurrection of the Big JC. And speaking of death and resurrection, frequent readers of this blog will recall the clarity of vision with which they once saw the path of their lives now become blurred and the way forward much less certain and fraught with missteps and stumbles...erm...we mean will recall the overlords in Iowa who pledged to resurrect the heartless exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit from the legislative death it suffered at the hands of people with souls. So how's that going?

The Telegraph Herald reports the Iowa Greyhound Association reduced the schedule because it didn’t get as much funding as it had hoped.

Hmmm. Looks like they got the death part down pretty well, but resurrection? Mmmm Not so much. It's obvious that there's some nefarious malefactor at work here. We mean, this was the overlords' big chance. Finally they were free of the burdensome government and the shackles placed upon them by the casinos that had supported them all those years. Finally they could tell the public the truth about the cruelty the greyhounds suffered, the depravity of the overlords and the constant risk of injury and death as the dogs were forced to chase after a smaller and smaller prize in a zombie industry that should have lain down and died years ago...ah...we mean finally the overlords could tell the public about the exciting sport of greyhound racing. Fun for the whole family! Finally, the overlords could tell the story their way and restore greyhound racing to its former glory. It was an exhilarating time.

Live dog racing could have a home in Iowa for the next few years, a state commission said Thursday in issuing a license that gives a trade group authority to run the soon-to-be last dog racetrack in the state.

 Oh come and stand in awe of the bright star that has arisen in the heavens! The stone has been rolled away and the tomb is empty! Hope and promise fill the air like the sweet, sweet scent of  Hyacinth in the spring. Could you not smell it IGA president Bob Hardison! It was the intoxicating aroma of success!

"This dedicated fund is more than enough to cover operations for live racing for the first five year lease the IGA will enter regarding the facility,"  Hardison said.

Of course it was! Of course! More than enough. Why as soon as you were to throw open the gates to the numberless crowds clamoring for their chance to watch greyhounds break their legs, their backs, get electrocuted or have heart attacks, all while losing the rent money at $2 a throw you would have created a perpetual motion machine of profit. Dubuque wold have become the shining city on the hill to all the other overlords and even the animal rights wackos would be forced to admit to the lies, misrepresentations and fabrications they had used to slander your noble calling.

What happened then, IGA president Bob Hardison? Did someone look through those gates and see that the numberless crowd consisted of six guys, two of whom were homeless and just looking for a place to get in out of the cold? Did someone point out that your calculations were indeed correct, but there was significance to the fact that your numbers were appearing in red ink? What led to this IGA president Bob Hardison:

The Iowa Greyhound Association is looking to claim nearly $5 million from a supplemental fund in an effort to help live dog racing in Dubuque.

 It is not a good sign that your business is five million in the hole before it even opens IGA president Bob Hardison, not a good sign at all. But you have a plan, don't you  IGA president Bob Hardison? A way forward. A solution.

The Iowa Greyhound Park won’t hold Saturday night races in its inaugural season. The track will still hold racing Wednesday and Friday nights, as well as Saturday and Sunday afternoons. The association says it will now start live races mid-May; it had planned to start at the end of April.

Yes, yes, of course. We should have seen it. It's brilliantly simple. In order to make the money you need to operate, you'll be open less.  Nothing wrong with that plan huh Clyde and Omar?

Have you ever wondered the effect Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum had on Alice when she sees them in a forest? Twins are very close and seeing that greyhound style is delightful. Clyde & Omar were littermates and have been together for most of their nine years, so wherever you find one, the other one is usually close, doing the same thing whether it’s keeping you company while watching TV, asking for some much appreciated TLC, or enjoying the yard outside. And do they ever enjoy the cooler weather as they can help their foster brother survey the property from a shady spot and keep those pesky rabbit neighbors under control! Then rattle those leashes and they are more than ready to head out and keep you company on a walk – you never know when one of those neighbors might actually be The White Rabbit! Clyde and Omar are true “make you feel good” boys, gentle and affectionate, just being with them is enough to make you smile – perhaps even like a Cheshire Cat! Canine Blood Heros…Ask why that makes them special! For more information about these dogs, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.