Fox News: We Report. You Flee In Horror

OK, full disclosure: We don't watch Fox News because even though there are foxes, there is no news that we are able to discern. Oh we do watch the occasional clip here and there, as you saw yesterday, but these are usually posted on other sites where the owners have a lot stronger gag reflex than we. Or a lot more adult beverages, we're not sure.

In the last couple of weeks though our interest has been piqued because it's appearing more and more likely that there's some high powered hallucinogenics floating around over there. Either that or the news producer is Captain Morgan.

First there was Michael Schurer who stumbled by to opine that the best thing that could happen to this country was to get blown up again. Now, you'd think that most people who had possession of their faculties might respond that if we'd had a president who could read back in 2001, we might not have gotten blown up in the first place, but since his interlocutor was none other than Glenn Beck the conversation went on as if Mr. Schurer were discussing the possibility of a thunderstorm before dinner.

Then yesterday we had Lieutenant Colonel, Fox News War Expert, Book Writer, never been in combat guy Ralph Peters on to advocate for the murder of an American soldier currently in enemy hands. Again, a person whose brain is operating within normal parameters might think a statement like that is just a wee tad over the line, and perhaps blushing just a little, might try to mitigate what Ranting Ralph said because, you know, the kid's family and friends might be watching and all, or if not that, just the fact that arguing for the death of a person in public under the guise of "analysis" strains the bounds of propriety in the civilized world outside of Fox studios.

But Noooooooo. Instead they send the P Dog on to the Bill Falafel show where he further displays his sociopathy while giving old Bill an opportunity to jump on the crazy train by calling the poor kid a "nut." Now, set aside for a moment that if anyone knows a nut when he sees one, it's Billo, the point is, in polite adult society, we generally do not take to the public airways to belittle and demean someone who is in mortal danger. Now, since this is Fox news we could see it if Private Bergdahl was black or Hispanic, but this is a white kid fer chrissakes!!

So today, Neil Cavuto, another sack of flatulence in the Fox descending colon comes on and says Dr. Regina M. Benjamin, President Obama's pick for Surgeon General is too fat to be a Surgeon General because everybody knows Surgeons General run marathons and compete in triathlons and stuff. Anyway, even though we figure if anybody knows fat it's Neil who doesn't seem to have missed too many appointments with the buffet table, mostly our reaction is Meh, is that all you got?

We mean, come on Neil. Your posse wants to kill a soldier and all you got it fatty fatty two by four? Mr. Ailes would like to see you in his office after lunch.