Shower Rooms! Why Didn't We Think of That?

Well here's a headline we never thought we'd see:

Bishops offer Penn State help to prevent abuse

It appears to be yet another example of, as we like to say around here, ironicus at its maximus.Oh we know what you're thinking, "Come on Ironicus, the best way to prevent burglaries is to hire and ex burglar to head up your security." Yeah. We get that. Trouble is, last time we checked there was nothing "ex" about the fondness of poppa Bene's boys for the prepubescent set...if you get our drift, so we're thinking fox, meet hen house. But let's see what the good folks at Archbishop of New York Timothy Dolan's Club for Overly Friendly Single Men has to say.

The erupting scandal at Penn State brought the horrors of the Catholic clerical sex abuse crisis back into the headlines this month and it made the bishops freshly "bow our heads in shame and contrition," said Archbishop of New York Timothy Dolan, president of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, at the annual fall meeting in Baltimore on Monday.

Brought back into the headlines?  Dude, brought back from like two days ago? And by the way, one man's bowed head in shame is another's perp walk with your cassock over your head. Just saying.

The bishops, whose policies and secrecy once allowed abuse to fester for decades, set forth in 2002 to create model screening programs and "safe environment training" for abuse protection and prevention.

 Yeah. So how's that working out for you? Not as helpful as the statute of limitations, huh?

Dolan said more than once that the Church is "timid about giving advice," but it stands ready to join any groups that want to take on this society-wide problem.

Groups you should join, groups you should join...hmm...we're thinking NAMBLA padre. What you got in mind?

"We haven't been a good example in the past but we are trying to become one," he said.

In a related story, the vatican announced today that they were starting a summer sports camp for boys aged 9 -12 in the summer of 2013.