Friday, September 27, 2013

Friday Hound Blogging

We're coming to you today from the Department of Serendipity here in the marbled halls of IM Central. The DOS in a division of the Unintended Consequences Company, a wholly owned subsidy of the Did You Really Mean To Say That Corporation.

Occasionally, when publishing stories about the overlords, little nuggets of truth appear, winking in the sunshine like slivers of gold in a stream bed as the torrent of industry blather, obfuscation and dissembling rushes over them. Even less often, those nuggets are large enough to catch our eyes, even as the froth and spume of overlord burble attempts to hide them. This is one of those times. Check out this headline:

Group campaigning to keep greyhound racing in Wimbledon dismiss animal cruelty concerns 

Well of course you dismiss animal cruelty concerns. When your whole industry is based on animal cruelty there's really nothing to be concerned about is there? It would be like the car companies being concerned about tire wear, or A restaurant being concerned that someone is going to drop a plate and break it. Sure, you want your tires to last a long time, and your plates to be strong, but stuff happens, you know? Tire wears out--throw it away and get another one. Plate breaks--sweep it up and get another one. Dog can't win anymore--kick it out of the kennel and get another one. So, since there's always another dog to take the place of the one you dump, what's there to be concerned about, right Diane McLean, spokesperson for the campaign?
“We are very optimistic about the future of greyhound racing at Wimbledon,” she said.
To be fair, Ms. McLean is also optimistic about the Care Bears running for public office, the development of a vaccine against butterflies, and the ability of coffee to restore tooth enamel.
Ms McLean claimed that the races were monitored by vets, who would be present in the paddock area and at the track. She cited the Greyhound Board of Great Britain as responsible for ensuring the safety of animals at the races.
Excellent! So when the dogs crash in the first turn the Vet can rush on the track and point out which dogs are worth saving and which are done for. Or maybe the Vet could test the 4D meat given to the dogs to determine what sort of pathogens it contains. Not that it would stop the overlords from feeding it to the dogs, but hey, we're paying this guy to be around the track so he ought to do something.
Ms McLean claimed that the greyhound ‘is the most protected breed of canine species’. “All greyhounds are now micro-chipped and all owners are registered with the GBGB and are responsible for their greyhound when it retires,” she said.  “GBGB must be informed where the dog is once it retires, for example, if it has gone home with the owner or put into a Retired Greyhound Trust kennel for homing.” The abandonment of retired greyhounds is one that has incensed animal rights campaigners, after investigations into the treatment of the animals who are often discarded by owners once they are no longer able to compete.
Oh those animal rights campaigners! They're such worry warts, right Ms. McLean? So what if the overlords cut the ears off the dogs they dump so they can't be traced back. Those days are over, huh? Now with the microchip cutting ears off won't be enough. No one would ever think of cutting the microchip out too. Check and mate Mr. Bad Apple overlord. Hey Knight, looks like you still have both your ears. Lucky you, huh?

I would do well in a single family home or a home with older, well-behaved kids. I would be fine being the only dog in the house or with other dogs. I really don’t care for being in my crate so I would do best in a home where someone is home or doesn’t want to crate me.  For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here.

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