Monday, April 25, 2011

And Quit Playin' That Dagum Devil Music

We're coming to you today from the Ebeneezer Scrooge Foundation for Public Policy here in the marbled halls of IM Central. ESFPP is a subsidiary of the Ayn Rand Institute For Sticking It To The Poors in partnership with the I Got Mine Center for Social Research That Proves he Rich Are Different.

Frequent reader(s) of this blog know that the invisible hand of the market is generally picking their pocket...er...we mean know that we take great pleasure in pointing out that residents of other states are often burdened by legislatures composed of walking advertisements for the need of better community mental health care in this country. Today, however we turn our gaze back to our own Water Winter Wonderland, the great state of Michigan (Motto: Poor? here's directions to Indiana) in the person of one State Senator Bruce Casswell (R-Grinch).

Under a new budget proposal from State Sen. Bruce Casswell, children in the state’s foster care system would be allowed to purchase clothing only in used clothing stores. “If they wanted nice things they should have stayed with their families,” Caswell says. “I got all the hand-me-downs when I was little and I wasn't even a foster kid. My parents just didn't like me.”

You know, Mr. Casswell, those foster kids, they aren't the ones who made fun of you when you were in school because you dressed funny. If you really want to get back at people who bullied you, you really don't do it by bullying someone else. Just a thought. Besides, some of those plaids you wore? Come on Mr. Casswell, they frightened small animals.

Casswell says the plan will save the state money, though it isn’t clear how much the state spends on clothing for foster children or how much could be saved this way. "Who cares how much we save," Casswell said.  "That's not as important as making sure those little delinquents know who's in charge."

OK, Mr. Caswell, but how about this, instead of your proposal, why don't we just pass a law that says they can't come on your lawn, and if they do, you get to squirt them with the hose as much as you want. Also, too, keep their baseball.

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