Santorum Sanatorium...Potato Potahto

In the interests of full disclosure we have to admit that we don't pay very much attention to the senators from our own state, so when we notice the shenanigans of a senator from another state, you know there's got to be some class A weirdness going on.

And the class A weirdo we're talking about is Senator Rick Santorum (motto: Is That A Milk Bone In Your Pocket, Or Are You Just Glad To See Me). First he writes a book that says all would be right with the world if women just quit expecting to be treated like...well...men, and now he's blaming the Catholic Church sex scandal not on horny priests, but MIT and Harvard.

''I was just saying that there's an attitude that is very open to sexual freedom in Boston, Santorum said. Reminded that the sexual abuse occurred across the country, Santorum said that ''at the time [in 2002], there was an indication that there was more of a problem there. Look, I monitor the child porn chat rooms pretty closely--as a public service of course--that's all I'm saying."

''This is one of those people who claims to have had eye contact with a blind woman," said Representative Barney Frank, referring to Santorum's role in the Terri Schiavo matter.

"I was using the Vulcan mind meld," Santorum responded.

Santorum startled people in the past when he linked ''man on child" and ''man on dog" sex with homosexuality. Earlier this year, he apologized for comparing the Democrats to Adolf Hitler. "I meant to say they were homosexuals," Santorum explained. "And they like dogs."

Referring to his book, Santorum said its central theme is how fostering the traditional family headed by a married man and woman can solve many of society's ills. When asked what those "ills" were he said, "well, uppity women for one."

Many women, he adds, have told him that it is more "socially affirming to work outside the home. That's usually right before they flip me off. Who taught girls to do that?"

When asked why it was so important that women give up their careers and not men, Santorum responded, "I have enough masculinity issues dealing with men in the workplace. I don't need women showing me up too."

The senator faces a tough race for reelection next year. Pennsylvania state treasurer Robert P. Casey Jr., the expected Democratic candidate, has been ahead or even with Santorum in recent polls, although Casey hasn't begun actively campaigning.

When asked if he was concerned that a candidate who hasn't started campaigning yet was beating him in some polls, Santorum said is was probably due to the fact that women could vote.