Friday Hound Blogging

We're coming to you today from the You Are What You Write Department here in the marbled halls of IM Central. YAWYW is a division of the I Know You Are But What Am I Corporation, in partnership with Projections R Us, LLC.


Frequent readers of this blog know settling is really the only victory...er...we mean know that every once in a while one or another of the overlords will step forward to defend their heartless, brutal industry sport usually through the surgical deployment of their logical prowess, rhetorical expertise and deep knowledge of their field. Also, name calling, whining and dissembling, but let's stick with the first three for now. In the past we have been treated to the argumentative stylings of people like Gary Guccione, Doug Pizzi and John Parker to name a few.

The general theme of overlord rebuttal to people who ask why exploiting innocent animals breeding dogs for greyhound racing, then tossing them aside like yesterday's newspaper moving heaven and earth to see that they are properly cared for after their careers are over is a proper career for a sentient being is to respond, "because SHUT UP!." Also, "You're ugly."

But lately a new issue has arisen that appears to have much more potential to harsh the overlords' mellow than anything the animal right wackos could do. To wit:

So much for my summer boredom. Yesterday I was complaining that I had too much time on my hands. Today my wife alerted me to current lobbying activity by extremist Cary Theil (pronounced teal like the color..) here in Florida. Unlike the Massachusetts effort to end greyhound racing, this time Theil and his housemate crazy Christine Dorchak who have used their grey2k causes as their personal piggy-bank to fund their lavish lifestyle are joining forces with the track owners, who want to nix live racing and focus on poker and slot machines.

Now, as you can see the first part of this paragraph contains the traditional overlord opening attacking Theil and Dorchak by accusing them of using the plight of greyhounds as an excuse to suck money off of clueless citizens who are naive enough to think that innocent living creatures ought not to be treated  as ATM machines by walking bags of wasted protein.

Psychologists call this projection because if you take out Theil and Dorchak and put in overlords, then take out citizens and put in rubes you have...well...greyhound racing.

It's the second part of that passage we'd like to draw your attention to:

...track owners, who want to nix live racing and focus on poker and slot machines.(emphasis ours)

As that roustabout philosopher and all around raconteur Scooby Doo might say, "Ruh Ro."  The track owners are like the overlords' Overlords because they own the real estate. No track to race on, no racing. This is a new development and to respond the overlords have developed an ad campaign aimed at the track owners with the slogan "Don't phase me out. Bro!"

Just kidding. We do, however feel obligated to point out that this is an example of Ironicus at it's Maximus. Think about it, the overlords are all like we luuuuves us some greyhounds as long as said greyhounds are filling the till. After that it's all hey, nothing personal Fido, just business. Now the track owners, who were staunch defenders and supporters of the overlords as long as they were filling the till are all like hey, nothing personal dude, just business. Karma Caniculae est!

Well, as you may imagine the overlords rise to this challenge as they have risen to every challenge before and vigorously defend  their right to scratch a meager existence off the backs of innocent animals.

One of Theil and Dorchak's largest donors is the Humane Society of the United States which cons old ladies out of their social security checks by making them think the HSUS actually runs animal shelters-- which is not true at all.

 Yeah! What you think of us now track owners? HSUS baby! Wait. Wrong vigorous defense there bud. Try again.

In Massachusetts, greyhound racing was strictly supervised. I visited three different kennels, all of which were spotless. The hounds were happy and healthy. When let out of their crates they were overjoyed to see their handlers and were eager to play with them. Abused hounds do not act like this. To improve the quality of racing greyhounds in Florida, bay all means... lobby the legislature to adopt the standards that Massachusetts had!

OK, see here's the thing about that: When the people ended racing in Massachusetts the track owners were left with a whole lot of nothing because they didn't have poker and slots. Doesn't seem to be the best approach to remind them of that. Just saying.

But to end racing altogether, will cause the breed as we know (and LOVE) it to become extinct. I have seen greyhounds bred for show-- and the temperament is so very different.

Oh, hey now that's better. How about this: Ever wonder why you don't see horses anymore? Because when the internal combustion engine was invented and nobody rode them anymore they became extinct. Just like the greyhounds will if you don't let us keep avoiding real work by living off them. Now that's got some snap to it, right Grizzly?

Grizzly is friendly and affectionate. He will approach and put his nose in your face for pets. He is very easygoing, but gets excited when he sees his leash. He is will stare at you in the morning when he wants you to wake up. Grizzly would do best in a home with a family that is home more often or in a working family that has another dog to keep him company during the day. He would do well with well-mannered older children, 10 and up. He is fine as the only dog and would probably be fine with other dogs. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here.