Friday, February 27, 2015

Friday Hound Blogging

We're coming to you today from the Fart In A Hurricane Department here in the marbled halls of IM Central. The FIAH Department is a division of the Spit Into The Wind Corporation, a wholly owned subsidy of Pee In The Ocean, LLC.

After weeks and weeks of being reminded that they are boils on the buttocks of society, that they are as useful as a screen door on a submarine, that their contribution to society is surpassed by an Ebola outbreak and that their so called profession has more in common with rabies than anything that might be considered valuable by sentient beings, the overlords have struck back.
Grey2K USA activists have created a distorted picture of greyhound racing at Gulf Greyhound Park, as well as other tracks across the country. This is intentional.These activists have a radical agenda that has far more to do with politics and fundraising than with animal welfare.
Now, we've heard this retort from the overlords many times and on one level it makes sense as simple projection because as overlord King says:

"More of a business than a pet." So with an attitude like that it's no wonder they see what the animal rights wackos do as a business too. When you're a hammer kind of thing, you know? Plus since they have about as much empathy as a wounded scorpion it's no wonder they can't conceive of anyone doing anything out of a sense of altruism, but here's our question: If animal rights wackos are only in it for the money, and they're helping to shut tracks down all over the country, aren't they killing their own market? We mean, if they only want to make money off the heartless exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit, why are they working so hard to end it? As Mr. Spock (RIP) would say, curious. But back to our story.
The Grey2K report on greyhound injuries was a collection of statistics that are easy to misrepresent if that’s the intention. For example, the report failed to explain that between 2009 and 2012, injuries occurred in fewer than one-tenth of one percent of all racing starts.
Ah, the old "Nothing To See Here" strategy. Don't look over there at all those greyhounds injured and dying, look over here to the ones who survived. Well, survived today at least. Each day brings a new opportunity to get hurt or killed, but we'll give you that Sally Briggs, general manager of Gulf Greyhound Park.You're saying not enough greyhounds are getting injured and killed to make a difference, so our question is, how many greyhounds have to suffer and die before you notice it?
The vast majority were minor, permitting the greyhounds to return to racing after treatment. Even in cases where injuries prevented a return to racing, the greyhounds transitioned successfully to life in adoptive homes.
OK, saying most greyhounds get hurt but we patch them up enough so they can go out there and possibly get hurt again, maybe more severely, is not a strong argument for your side there overlord Briggs, and as far as the transitioning into adoptive homes thing goes, how do you square that with what overlord King says:
When we have dogs which we cannot rehome we take them to the vet and have them euthanized humanely.
Sounds like somebody didn't get the memo.
Anyone with an ounce of common sense should recognize that preventing injuries and providing the best possible care for greyhounds is not only the right thing to do, but it’s good business.
Well of course it is overlord Briggs, but it's better business to take a dog that's slow or injured, dump it as quickly as possible and replace it with another helpless victim...erm...we mean with fresh inventory...no...uh...competitor.  Yeah that's it, competitor because, as you have said many times, the dogs love to run around a closed track risking injury and death so they can help you grab a smaller and smaller piece of a shrinking money pie. Or words to that effect.
Industry regulations require that greyhounds be housed in comfortable crates large enough to permit them to stand, sit, lie down and turn around comfortably.
 Well, that's good because since the dogs are in their crates 18 to 22 hours a day being able to turn around is helpful. Of course being able to stretch our on a nice soft dog bed, or a couch would be better, but like overlord King says, "they are more of a business than a pet" so we see where you are coming from.
Similarly, greyhounds must be turned out for exercise four to five times daily to ensure that they remain in top condition. When they’re not racing or exercising, they prefer to rest.
Sure, but when you're in a crate that only has enough room to stand up and turn around in what choice do you have but "rest?" It's not like they can run and catch a Frisbee or anything, you know?
Good nutrition is another key to the health of racing greyhounds. The meat they consume is the same found in most commercial pet foods — the same diet most of our pets enjoy.
Yeah, that's true about the meat, but you left out the part about how the meat in commercial pet food is cooked to kill the pathogens, and the meat for the units isn't, hence the prevalence of things like  microorganisms, including Salmonella spp, Campylobacter jejuni, and Escherichia coli. Mmmm.  Campylobacter jejuni. Sounds like it'd be really good with a little hot sauce, right Dasher?

Dasher is a five year old male just rescued. He will need a home without cats. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday, February 20, 2015

Friday Hound Blogging

Oh the woe that is being visited upon the overlords. To paraphrase EAP:
vainly they had sought to borrow
From delusion surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the lost Dollar -
For the slow and stupid Marks whom the angels name The Rubes-
Absent now for evermore.
Or words to that effect. Anyway the point is another week has passed and as the overlords arise and peer through the cellophane covering the trailer window on this deep winter day, when the air is almost as frigid as their black little hearts, what manner of travail stares back at them...


Sorry. Just felt like working dramatic chipmunk in there. Actually it's pretty much sameo sameo this week.
Discussions are underway at the State Capitol about how West Virginia gets out of the dog racing business. “Something is going to be done; it’s just a matter of time,” said Senate Finance Committee Chairman Mike Hall (R-Putnam).
Get out of the dog racing business. Man. Not too many ways to interpret that huh overlords? Well, maybe we shouldn't be so hasty. After all, the overlords have made missing the point and changing the subject into an art form. Just check out some of the comments on this story. Our favorites are the ones about a dog that ran thirty five years ago and the rant about tracks that closed before Grey2K came along. Kind of making their point for them there Mr. Floatingboat, don't you think? But back to our story.
A recent independent study by Spectrum Gaming Group chronicled the epic decline of greyhound racing at the tracks in Wheeling and Cross Lanes. Wagering has dropped from $35 million in 2003 to just $16 million in 2013. Attendance has declined from over 900,000 people annually to just 13,000 (though some in the greyhound industry question those attendance figures).
Well of course they do because you can't argue with the dollar decline so you try to change the subject to how heads were counted. This is overlord obfuscation 101 Mr. Reporter sir. If you've been reporting on the heartless exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit for more than a half hour or so we're surprised you didn't see that.
Hall and others in the leadership are working on several different options:
1) Cut off payments to the breeders fund and at some point begin phasing out the subsidy of the purses.
2) Eliminate payments to the breeder’s fund and the purses, but offer a buyout to qualifying breeders. 3) Do nothing.
Hall is among those who believe the industry is fading and the money should be recouped, but he’s not willing to rush a decision. “We do not want to have an unintended consequence.”
We hear you Chairman Hall and believe us, if one of those "unintended consequences" is that the overlords have to go out and get real jobs, we're sure they hear you too.
The West Virginia greyhound industry is divided over the future. Sam Burdette, president of the West Virginia Greyhound Owners and Breeders Association, favors a buyout. However, breeder Lester Raines believes greyhound racing is still viable.
When asked to explain why he thought placing helpless greyhounds at risk of death and injury on a daily basis in the futile attempt to squeeze a few last dollars out of a dead industry, zombie walking to oblivion was "viable," Mr. Raines couldn't really point to any specific reasons, although he did admit that the sky on his planet was pink.
Governor Tomblin, whose late mother, Freda, benefited from the breeder’s fund for years, acknowledges times have changed. “As the wagering has continued to decline, it’s time we start looking at how we continue with this industry,” he said.
 Well, if by "continue" you mean shoot it in the brain, cut its head off, bury it, set the grave on fire then build an concrete memorial on top of that to all the dogs who have died so the overlords could preserve their leech-like existence for another day, then yeah, we're with you. That about sum it up Edward?


My foster mom says I am a real lover. I love to “hug” you. I do the typical Greyhound lean. I love to follow my foster mom around. I am cuddly, friendly and outgoing. I have met cats and dogs of all sizes when I get to go to work with my foster mom who is a groomer. I even live with a bunny in my foster home. I love to go for walks and do well on the leash. I love everybody I meet. I am housebroken. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here

Friday, February 13, 2015

Friday Hound Blogging

Frequent reader(s) of this blog will recall the vivacious colors of youth bursting against an azure sky of promise like multicolored madness now become lugubrious ghosts under the desultory clouds of increasing entropy...erm...we mean will recall that we have been chronicling the slow (and not so slow) descent of the overlords into irrelevancy.  And this week, oh they have greased the skids fellow sailors on this ship of fools.

Now even the Arabs have noticed.
Citing more than 600 sources, including state racing commission reports and records, veterinary journal articles, necropsy reports, National Greyhound Association documents, books and newspaper stories, the national report on greyhounds said at least 909 greyhound deaths have been documented. In Florida, a racing greyhound dies every three days, according to state records. The report also documented 11,722 greyhound injuries, including fractured skulls, broken necks and electrocutions, and 27 cases of animal cruelty, including dogs starved to death and denied veterinary care.
That' Aljazeera man. Al freakin' Jazeera which usually reports on who's mad at the king in north Wangdangistan, or what the demonstrations are about in the capitol city of Al Gebra, has turned their attention to the heartless commodification of innocent living creatures for the sole purpose of making (no) money and determined that greyhound racing sucks gravel through a straw.

Now that just has to leave a mark.
“We would like to reduce the amount of dog racing we do here,” Izzy Havenick, co-owner of the Naples-Fort Myers Track and Entertainment Center, told America Tonight in December. Havenick said the dog track loses $2.5 million a year, and he wants Florida lawmakers to change the law to make the poker rooms and greyhound racing independent of one another, a move dubbed “decoupling.” Greyhound breeders and owners oppose decoupling.
"Well of course breeders oppose decoupling," Havenick continued. "As long as there's racing I'm paying $2.5 mill a year to keep those useless bags of mostly wasted protein off the job market. Would you turn down a deal like that?"

We like to think we would, especially if it  required contining injury and death for the greyhounds still trapped in the deathcamps. What do you say Jeff Kottkamp, a former Florida lieutenant governor who lobbies on behalf of Florida Greyhound Association?

Dog owners and breeders say they have a financial interest in keeping their dogs healthy and happy. “The people that own these dogs love these dogs," Kottkamp said. "Well, until they stop winning that is, then they dump them like yesterday's trash, bring in a new one and the process starts all over again. We call it inventory rotation."

If this were not a family blog we might suggest something else you could rotate on, Mr. Kottkamp, but let's get back to the report.
“Thirty-nine states have already made the humane decision to ban greyhound racing, but this cruel sport continues to exploit greyhounds despite public outcry and overwhelming financial losses from a dying industry,” Nancy Perry, senior vice president of government relations at ASPCA, said in a statement.
 Thirty nine, huh? Well that's a pretty substantial number. So what states are left?
In addition to Florida, six other states operate greyhound tracks: Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Iowa, Texas and West Virginia.
Iowa? Come on now Aljazeera.  Iowa is the Schrodinger's cat of racing. It both exists and it doesn't, and as soon as any attention is payed to it, the situation will collapse. And West Virgina? Well, OK, there is racing in West Virginia. Today. We'd check back tomorrow if we were you. Wouldn't you agree Judge?


I am lovable, bonding, and silly. I am a very active boy so I need guidance. I am strong willed. I love to play with toys. I am a big leaner. Unlike most Greyhounds, I know how to sit. I love to run and play and do zoomies in the yard. I am a real Velcro dog. I get along with dogs of all sizes and kitties too. I am housebroken. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here

Friday, February 06, 2015

Friday Hound Blogging

We're coming to you today from the If It Weren't For Bad Luck, Wouldn't Have Any Luck At All Department here in the marbled halls of IM Central. The IIWFBLWHALAA Department is a division of the Sunk So Low Have To Look Up To See Down Corporation, a wholly owned subsidy of It's Always Darkest Just Before Someone Hits You In The Head With A Shovel, NA.

As we have chronicled in this blog, 2015 has not been kind to the overlords. We mean, when you read headlines like  State subsidies for greyhound racing could be better spent and Dog Racing Becoming A Thing of the Past and those are the good news stories, at least compared to Orange Park greyhound racing deaths at top in the state well, let's just say the heartless exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit has a bit of a problem vis-a-vis people who can count and have souls.

But, say what you will about the overlords--and we often do--they've never been a group of third grade dropouts with substance abuse problems and anger management issues that lets a little thing like reality get them down, right JJ Steinoff of Kenosha, a member of United Greyhound Racing?
To start, I would bring back the greyhounds but add pari-mutuel snowmobile racing in the winter months as an added attraction.
OK, Wisconsin, snowmobiles. We get that. But it sounds like you're saying people would come out to see helpless greyhounds caught in the meat grinder of a dying industry risk death and injury, and when they couldn't see that they'd settle for snowmobile racing. You are talking about the Wisconsin on planet earth, right?
Greyhound racing has made great strides in the last few years, with attendance and overall handle up at many tracks and the sport just had its first national championship race since 1993.
 OK, we think we see your problem. See when people drive by the track and happen to glance at the empty parking lot and the crumbling buildings, that doesn't count as "attendance." And as for the national championship thing? That's like the "Miss Universe" contest. You can call it whatever you want, but that doesn't mean that's really what it is.
I fully believe that the sport’s best days are ahead of us and would be happy to share our blueprint for future success to anyone interested.
Well, if by "best days are ahead of us" you mean soon all the greyhounds living in money losing deathcamps will be liberated and the overlords will finally have to get real jobs, then yeah, we're with you. Otherwise, not so much.
Snowmobile racing, even without wagering, is extremely popular up north and I feel the races would be a huge attraction in this part of the state, especially if used with the same interactive and modern technology that the greyhounds would be using. Only the first floor of the Dairyland building would be needed for racing.
Um...Mr. Steinoff sir? Having push and pull signs on the doors so the rubes can figure out how to get in and out is not  "interactive and modern technology." We do get what you're saying about the first floor though, but you can get even more specific than that. Since only about six people show up for greyhound races anyway, you could probably get by with just that table over in the corner. You know, the one with the wobbly legs and the mismatched chairs?
The next revenue idea for the Menominee is to create a fantasy sports app and then build an intimate sports bar/sports book type setting on the second floor of Dairyland. In the last five years, fantasy sports has taken off and exploded into a whole new area of sports wagering. Plus, it’s 100 percent legal in Wisconsin, as long as the prize is not tied to a score of the contest but is predicted on statistics. People love to bet on football, baseball and basketball and fantasy sports has the potential to be bigger than any gambling platform the world has ever seen.
Well, you may be right Mr. Steinoff, but here's our question: Why would anyone want to be down on the first floor reading some wrinkled old racing form, surrounded by drunks and people without teeth when that person could be up on the second floor being part of an experience "bigger than any gambling platform the world has ever seen?" You have any thoughts on the matter Nevah?


This lovely girl, who’s name is “Haven” spelled backwards has just been liberated. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

Friday, January 30, 2015

Friday Hound Blogging

Frequent reader(s) of this blog who once cast their eyes over the limitless vista of hope and promise and thought "I will make this mine" now must huddle in the cold shadow of lowered expectations...erm...we mean will recall we reported on the overlords in Iowa and their quest to open a deathcamp for greyhounds with half the money the casinos gave them to go away because if you want something done right, ignore all the evidence that it can't be done, Reality and the overlords seldom travel the same road, however, so the Racing Commission said fine, if that's what you want to do, it's not illegal to be stupid, and off the overlords went to recapture those exciting days of yesteryear before people with souls learned what was happening to the inventory.

So how's that going?
The Iowa Greyhound Association is looking to claim nearly $5 million from a supplemental fund in an effort to help live dog racing in Dubuque.
OK, so you haven't even started yet, but you've figured out you need $5 mill more to pull this thing off? What about when you said "this dedicated fund is more than enough to cover operations for live racing for the first five year lease the IGA will enter regarding the facility?" Oh wait, don't answer that. You were thinking people would actually come to the track when it opened weren't you? Well, don't worry, it's an easy enough mistake to make...if you're an idiot.

But hey, this is America right? Home of Trongs, watermelon strollers and the bottle opener remote, so why not pour more money into the heartless commodification of innocent living creatures for (no) profit? We mean it's got to have at least a good of a chance of paying off as  bacon bandages, right West Virginia?
A study commissioned by state lawmakers says greyhound racing subsidies are a bad investment and should be eliminated.
Whoa. That's kind of cold, don't you think? We mean all that's going on here is the killing and maiming of hundreds of helpless greyhounds every year so that a couple of drunks can lose the rent money and keep the overlords out of the labor pool for a while. What's so bad about that? Right greyhound breeder Steve Sarras?
“You can manipulate statistics any way you want to manipulate them,” Sarras said.
Darn straight. You get those stiff necked Yankees coming in here with all their high falutin' math and such and next thing you know they're telling everybody ain't no future in paying the overlords not to work. Well, somebody needs to tell it like it is and Stevie is just the man for the job, so come on you liberal eggheads, give him your best shot.
In-state wagers dropped 55 percent from 2004 to 2013 at West Virginia’s two greyhound tracks, Wheeling Island Hotel Casino Racetrack and Mardi Gras Casino and Resort, the report said. In Wheeling, greyhound racing drew 929,000 spectators in 1983, a number that is now down to 13,000 or an estimated 50 people per race day.
 Ha! Just as we thought. You're using fancy pants statistical numbers and such to imply that just because no one is coming to the tracks anymore racing is unpopular and unprofitable. Typical east coast elitist disdain for the good folks out here in flyover country. We wouldn't have expected anything else from a bunch of  carpet bagger snake oil salesmen. What we need is to hear from a good old boy, someone whose roots are here and who knows what we know. What about you Senate Minority Leader Jeff Kessler? You've lived here all your life. Tell these pencil necked northern geeks where to get off. Go ahead lay a little down home what it is on their pasty white behinds.

“We are subsidizing a sport that nobody’s watching.”

Boom! There it is study boy! What you think of us now? You can just pack your kit into your little Prius and wait what?
Now may be the time, Kessler said, to start rolling back West Virginia’s investments in greyhounds.
 Umm..OK. Jeez Tyler, that did not go the way we expected.

Snuggly and smart, this handsome fellow is very inquisitive. He’s playful and very good company. Tyler has a passion for food, so never trust him, no matter what he tells you!! This boy should be in sales with his schmoozing! ! Did we mention smart? Tyler has been busy learning home etiquette and rules. He’s getting along nicely with his foster sibs. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.