Monday, November 24, 2008

How Do You Say Jihad In Latin?

Regular readers of this blog know that they'll never be rich enough to be taxed by President Obama...er...we mean know that we've written on several occasions about our attendance at the local educorporate training facility overseen by the benevolent malevolencey of the church catholic. A situation from which we escaped upon graduation from Our Lady of the Perpetual Collection Plate High School (Bingo on Saturdays!) and never looked back.

This, however has us reconsidering.

In comments that could have broad implications in a period of intense religious conflict, Pope Benedict XVI cast doubt on the possibility of interfaith dialogue but called for more discussion of the practical consequences of religious differences. "The pope is concerned that it may be a waste of time to talk with people who are going to hell anyway," said a vatican spokesman.

Oh, yeah! Religious tolerance? Popey don't play that.

The pope’s comments came in a letter he wrote to Marcello Pera, an Italian center-right politician and scholar whose forthcoming book, Why We Must Call Ourselves Christian, argues that Europe should stay true to its Christian roots which it developed around 313 AD. "Europe wasn't really Europe before then. Didn't have zip codes or anything." the spokesperson added. "It's all about god. Really. It is. Just look at the title of the pope's letter on religious dialogue: Arabs back to Arabland. Er...It sounds better when you say it in Latin."

In quotations from the letter that appeared in Corriere della Sera, Italy’s leading daily newspaper, the pope said the book “explained with great clarity” that “an interreligious dialogue in the strict sense of the word is not possible.”

"Well, by 'not possible' the pope didn't really mean not possible, just...umm...OK maybe that's what he did mean. Look, he's old and that whole Nazi youth thing still affects him, you know. He's used to there only being one point of view."

Benedict added that “intercultural dialogue which deepens the cultural consequences of basic religious ideas” was important. He called for confronting “in a public forum the cultural consequences of basic religious decisions. by people other than catholics. And if that doesn't work, shoot them. Hey it worked in 1940."

The Vatican spokesman, the Rev. Federico Lombardi, said the pope’s comments seemed intended to draw interest to Mr. Pera’s book, not to cast doubt on the Vatican’s many continuing interreligious dialogues. “He has a papacy known for interacting with the wrong religions; he peed on the carpet at a mosque, he’s tagged walls at synagogues,” Father Lombardi said. “This means that he thinks we can meet and talk to the others and have a positive relationship in which they admit they're wrong and transfer their assets to the one and only true church (Bingo on Saturdays!).”

This month, the Vatican held a conference with Muslim religious leaders and scholars aimed at "Getting their minds right with god." The conference participants agreed to condemn terrorism except when necessary to "help individuals and societies along the path to righteousness," and protect religious freedom, but they did not address issues of conversion and of the rights of Christians in majority Muslim countries to worship. Which, of course meant that religious freedom wasn't protected, but it sounded better in Latin.

After the conference the vatican issued a statement calling on all catholics to have more children and to make sure an attend the special Double Payback Bingo this Saturday.

1 comment:

Michelle Young Cuenant said...

it is an incredible era and an incredible "regime" when seventy-year olds still try and reign lands bursting at the seams, with different cultures, languages, customs, mixed marriages and open relationships , (gay or not,) all embracing everything the world holds....including independent thoughts and a questioning attitudes.
No-one is asking for this Pope to change, but surely, the next one elected might be as young as fifty. It is obvious that wisdom does not necessarily come with age and it is intolerable that the Vatican maintains "useless rules" that have very little to do with being "holy".
Poverty is increasing every day due to over-populations and a lack of food and shelter, and diseases still plague those countries being taught to "pro-create".
If the Pope is too far gone for any "reciprocation" Bishops, world-wide must abide by their conscience.
The Catholic Church has lost a generation who witnessed pedophile priests and a criminal attitude of "hiding it" and all along, denying even its existence.
One would think, more than ever, women just might even be "more deserving" and give them the right to be ordained.
To me, and millions of others, a religion must be true and fair and wise. Until Catholicism brings us back with better understandings, the Vatican will depend more and more upon the destitute and fearful immigrants, and forever hoping to bring back those "glory" days.