Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Well, Imitation Is The Sincerest Form Of Flattery

Hey, Condoleezza Rice is still Secretary of State. Who knew? We thought she took that job with Bergdorfs. But whatever, this is great for us, right. Right? See because her expertise is on Russia and now that those pesky Ruskies are kicking up a snit over there in Georgia she can make up for all those bad calls on Iraq and Afghanistan (who understand Arabs anyway?) OK madame Secretary, put that expensive education to use.

US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice warned Russia it was isolating itself from the international community with its behaviour in Georgia. "And if there's anyone who knows about isolation, it's us," she added. "I mean look at the coalition of the willing. Who's left? Burkina Faso? Yeah. They're a game changer."

"When you start invading smaller neighbours, bombing civilian infrastructure, going into villages and wreaking havoc and (carrying out) the wanton destruction of (its) infrastructure, that is isolating. At that point irony detectors installed in the meeting room activated and the press conference had to be delayed until Homeland Security officials determined that no writers for the Daily Show were present in the building.

Rice said the ministers wanted to demonstrate in their strongly worded statement that NATO was pretty much impotent (and not in a good way) so Russia could dictate the terms of when former Soviet states such as Georgia and Ukraine could join the Alliance. "But expect not to be invited to all the cool parties," Rice added.

"This is a very clear statement that NATO, having come so far after the end of the Cold War and the collapse of the Soviet Union... is not going to permit a new line to be drawn in Europe," Rice said. "There will absolutely be no new line, NATO does not accept that there is a new line and we are not acting as if there is a new line," she said. "But if there was a new line, it would probably be somewhere to the west of Georgia and Ukraine. Just saying."

When told of the statement issued by NATO and Secretary Rice's news conference, Vitaly Churkin, Representative of the Russian Federation at the UN said, "безотносительно."

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