There is, however another class of stories, a class so bizarre, so outre', so incredibly boggling as to flitter one's mind as if it were a dishtowel in a hurricane. These are stories that cause one's eyes to bug out; that cause one to expectorate one's adult beverage onto the screen of one's electronic computing and calculating device; that cause one to exclaim, in the immortal words of Father Nestor our old Latin Prof, " Sanctus Concubitus Excrementum!"
Today we bring you an example of that last class of story, but before we go on we feel it is necessary to warn you that these two stories, if read side by side may result in the intellectual equivalent of mixing matter and anti-matter. We are so concerned for your mental well being that we offer each story in it's own color so that you may read one entirely and digest it before reading the other. And that is the way we recommend that you read them because to mix them is to tempt the fates; it is to laugh in the face of the gods of sanity and reason; it is to thumb your nose at the very forces of nature and the order of the universe.
On the other hand, an adult beverage or two may provide just the protective shield you need. Ready? Here we go. Story number one:
The Belle Vue racetrack in Manchester was home to yet another packed card yesterday, with 14 exciting 470m races on the schedule. Each action-packed race kept greyhound racing fans on the edges of their seats with excitement.OK, so far so good. Just another overlord trying to convince the rubes they had fun losing the rent money. Now, story number two:
A veteran greyhound racing enthusiast has vowed to "give up the game" after six greyhounds were "put down" following serious injuries at Manchester's Belle Vue dog track in just over a week.OK. You read those together, didn't you, even after we warned you not to. We'll give you a moment to pick yourself up off the floor and freshen your drink. Ready? Uh...you still have a few drippings left on the screen there...no over to the right...yeah just there. Need another tissue? OK, story one:
The first race of the day, which began at 14:18, featured six terrific competitors. Odds makers selected Wi Wi Wi Delilah as the favourite with 7-1 odds before the race, and the pup did not disappoint. Wi Wi Wi Delilah won the race with an early pace and a great finish of 28.70 seconds, and has had a relatively mixed record as of late. Just Gilbert (4-1) took second place by 2 lengths and a finish of 28.86.One the bright side, apparently these six "terrific competitors" had the good fortune of finishing in one piece. Story two:
The middle-aged man, who said he had raced dogs at the stadium for half his life, contacted greyhound protection group Greyhound Action on Sunday, after a two year old dog, called Ballyverry Rock, was "put down" after being badly injured in a race the previous evening. The man, who asked for his name not to be divulged, said the dog's death was "the final straw" for him, after witnessing five fatal injuries to greyhounds at Belle Vue the previous weekend.Obviously Ballyverry Rock was not a "terrific competitor." Sort of like the guys before Arnold Schwarzenegger in The Running Man. Story one:
The race’s favourite, Remember Jay Bee, finished a shoulder behind Gortnagrage Jel in 28.59. Remember Jay Bee carried 9-4 odds into the race, but failed to deliver a good performance in the end. Fifth place went to Ammunition (7-2, 28.67, 1 length), while Baltylum Droopy (5-2, 28.68) finished a head behind Ammunition in last place.Uh oh. Jay Bee "failed to deliver a good performance." Isn't that what Blofeld said to Number Three in From Russia with Love just before he killed him? Story two:
"He said he'd raced greyhounds at the track for half his life, but these latest fatalities were the 'final straw' and he was 'giving up the game' because of lack of concern by the racing industry for the welfare of the dogs. "He asked us not to reveal his personal details, saying he'd be 'lynched', if 'certain people' involved with greyhound racing at Belle Vue discovered he'd been in touch with us. Greyhound Action's UK Co-ordinator, Tony Peters, said.Yeah. First rule of cruelty and callous disregard for innocent living creatures in greyhound racing is don't talk about cruelty and callous disregard for innocent living creatures in greyhound racing. Story one:
The greyhound racing action at Belle Vue will resume on 26 August, with yet another action-packed card.Too bad they can't train the greyhounds to say "We who are about to die salute you," huh Ironhorse?
He is still a puppy at heart. He is energetic and friendly with a silly attitude that makes him fun to have around. He is very playful and tries to get the other dogs in his foster home excited and frisky. Ironhorse would do well in a working family home with well-mannered children, 10 and up. He would do best in a home with a fenced yard that he can gallop around in. He is good with other dogs and would probably be good as an only dog with a family that will play with him regularly. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here.