Thursday, September 16, 2010

And If You Ask Where Calvin Is, They Say Don't Be So Literal

"Life is a kit," our old daddy used to say. By that we think he meant it's over priced, the instructions don't make any sense and there's always a part or two missing. But sometimes life presents you with a gift that is so complete, so perfectly finished, so whole as to unite you with the cosmos in such a way as to make time vanish and universal truth wash over you like eternal starlight. This is one of those gifts.

It seems there is this band called The New Pornographers, which is neither new, nor pornographic. And there is this college called Calvin College which is not run by a guy named Calvin, but does appear to be a college, albeit it one controlled by the christian reformed church, which brings us to the point of this little disquisition.

It seems the college that is not run by a guy named Calvin invited the band that is neither new nor pornographic to come to campus for a little musical interlude. Well, as you might imagine this precipitated no small amount of concern amongst the elders as christian reform and pornography are not generally mentioned in the same breath.

So, because the college that is not run by a guy named Calvin is in fact a seat of higher learning, great effort was expended to educate those residents of the community who were not, as the kids say, hep cats. Tragically, we have to report that effort failed and the band who is neither new, nor pornographic was dis-invited by the college that is not run by a guy named Calvin, but the public announcement of the dis-invitation of the band that is neither new, nor pornographic contained a little nugget, a jewel, a perfect diamond of truth that is so complete in its thought, so whole in its construction, so simple in its expression that we had to bring it to your attention. To wit:
However, after weeks of discussion and consideration, the irony of the band's name was impossible to explain to many.
 Oh, amen brother, and...amen.

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