Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Fox News: We Report. You Flee In Horror

OK, full disclosure: We don't watch Fox News because even though there are foxes, there is no news that we are able to discern. Oh we do watch the occasional clip here and there, as you saw yesterday, but these are usually posted on other sites where the owners have a lot stronger gag reflex than we. Or a lot more adult beverages, we're not sure.

In the last couple of weeks though our interest has been piqued because it's appearing more and more likely that there's some high powered hallucinogenics floating around over there. Either that or the news producer is Captain Morgan.

First there was Michael Schurer who stumbled by to opine that the best thing that could happen to this country was to get blown up again. Now, you'd think that most people who had possession of their faculties might respond that if we'd had a president who could read back in 2001, we might not have gotten blown up in the first place, but since his interlocutor was none other than Glenn Beck the conversation went on as if Mr. Schurer were discussing the possibility of a thunderstorm before dinner.

Then yesterday we had Lieutenant Colonel, Fox News War Expert, Book Writer, never been in combat guy Ralph Peters on to advocate for the murder of an American soldier currently in enemy hands. Again, a person whose brain is operating within normal parameters might think a statement like that is just a wee tad over the line, and perhaps blushing just a little, might try to mitigate what Ranting Ralph said because, you know, the kid's family and friends might be watching and all, or if not that, just the fact that arguing for the death of a person in public under the guise of "analysis" strains the bounds of propriety in the civilized world outside of Fox studios.

But Noooooooo. Instead they send the P Dog on to the Bill Falafel show where he further displays his sociopathy while giving old Bill an opportunity to jump on the crazy train by calling the poor kid a "nut." Now, set aside for a moment that if anyone knows a nut when he sees one, it's Billo, the point is, in polite adult society, we generally do not take to the public airways to belittle and demean someone who is in mortal danger. Now, since this is Fox news we could see it if Private Bergdahl was black or Hispanic, but this is a white kid fer chrissakes!!

So today, Neil Cavuto, another sack of flatulence in the Fox descending colon comes on and says Dr. Regina M. Benjamin, President Obama's pick for Surgeon General is too fat to be a Surgeon General because everybody knows Surgeons General run marathons and compete in triathlons and stuff. Anyway, even though we figure if anybody knows fat it's Neil who doesn't seem to have missed too many appointments with the buffet table, mostly our reaction is Meh, is that all you got?

We mean, come on Neil. Your posse wants to kill a soldier and all you got it fatty fatty two by four? Mr. Ailes would like to see you in his office after lunch.


Anonymous said...

Let's just go back even further. Billo sexually came onto a "fellow worker"...(we don't even care if it's girl or boy or man or woman)
He did it and he did it with a wedding ring on!
Let's ask Billo how much he had to cough for all his dishonesty to his wife and "Christianity"?
The network is full of cheap long legs dirty blondes, and stupidity.

Anonymous said...

A funny quote from "Bruno" when talking about "Hitler" can sum up a lot of these hysterical, egotistical sickos clamoring for the limelight.
They are all "a little bit Bitch".

Anonymous said...

Regina Benjamin, despite her true calling to serve and quietly, during hurricanes, after flooding, with all the major poverty, and ignorance and suffering, she kept the pace and the cover for the sick and less fortunate. And isn't it amazing, all these ill-educated, self-serving "Christian Right" screamers and FOX hypocrits, denouncing Obama's pick not because she is black; not because she is highly motivated and educated and self-sacrificing, but more than they, are true to God's Word!
FOX "news" is such a farce. What they all do for money!

Seeing Eye Chick said...

Ah come on, Fux News made it terribly clear that the only reason they want Sarah Palin for a Candidate for POTUS, is because she has NO brain, Nice legs and a decent rack.

Fux News: NO Fat Chicks!

Because the only reason a woman would use her brain, is because she is either fat, a lesbian, or ugly---or all three.

Personally, women get old, they get a bit of a spread. I would be more worried MS Benjamin were a size 0, because then I would be waiting for the Aderol to fall out of her clutch. Personally she isn't fat, she is fluffy. Don't make me take these bitches out and show them fat. Ever seen Flush in a speedo? That my friends is fat.

They make it sound like Benjamin is Star Jones pre stomach Staple. and even then, oh well. People become overweight for a lot of different reasons. Some of them that have nothing to do with binging on a case of ho hos every friday night while watching Grease II with a collection of vibrators.

Anonymous said...

Very true Seeing Eye must not forget that there are several reasons why one "spreads", fatigue being a huge problem for the "overly-worked". One needs schedules for bodies to function properly, and eating and sleeping are a major concern.
Considering we don't know her genetics and her family history, just seeing how much she puts "on her plate", scholastically and physically, would cause any body to fluctuate, which her body has done. Not everbody is into Red Velvet Cake and fried chicken! Some people actually WORK for a living!

Anonymous said...

As someone said quite simply:
"Pat Tillmann".

出会い said...