The British Greyhound Racing Board is launching the first advertising campaign in the sport's 80 year history. The campaign, created and planned by Ward Lovett aims to revamp the image of greyhound racing and appeal to a new generation of visitors. "Yeah. We figure this tee vee thing is here to stay," Lovett said.
When reporters asked who would compose the 'new generation of visitors' Lovett replied that, thanks to modern dentistry it was true that not as many people went through life missing most of their teeth, so the pool of potential customers was 'substantially reduced,' Lovett felt the difference could be made up through attracting those with substance abuse problems. "They don't have as much disposable income because they're spending it on the dope," Lovett said. "But we're going to schedule races and specials around when welfare checks are distributed."
Ha. We knew it was only a matter of time before the fine minds at overlord central would zero in on the problem. The future's so bright, they have to wear shades. Well, there are a couple of...er...wrinkles.
These days Tucson Greyhound Park looks more like a ghost town than a racetrack.
As racing began on a recent Thursday night, only a handful of people dotted the stands. A lull hung in the air until the first dogs burst from their gates, mercifully bringing a rush of energy that woke up several people who had dozed off in the homeless camp under the stands.
OK, we know what you're thinking. End of the line track. Clientele made up of a high percentage of persons with...erm...cognitive dysfuntions, and an overlord class that is one step ahead of the bill collector. Sounds pretty dangerous for the dogs right? Wrong. How many times do we have to explain the deep and abiding love the overlords have for the units...er...dogs. After this track, it's a first class ticket to adoption city right boys?
OK, we know what you're thinking. End of the line track. Clientele made up of a high percentage of persons with...erm...cognitive dysfuntions, and an overlord class that is one step ahead of the bill collector. Sounds pretty dangerous for the dogs right? Wrong. How many times do we have to explain the deep and abiding love the overlords have for the units...er...dogs. After this track, it's a first class ticket to adoption city right boys?
When their racing days are over at the track, some of the dogs will return to their owners. Others go on to breeders or adoption groups. See? What'd we tell you?
But other dogs just "disappear," said greyhound activists, who fear unwanted dogs may have been euthanized. These fears have been underscored by the state's investigation into the alleged disappearance of 100 to 200 greyhounds that had recently left the track for Colorado.
In this case, the track contracted with a trainer in Colorado to move the dogs to various adoption agencies. The dogs were taken from the track by the Colorado trainer, but they were never delivered to adoption groups.
Oh. Umm...well...it's got to be some sort of misunderstanding. Let's see what the person transporting the dogs has to say.
The trainer has not returned calls.
Yeah. Uh...OK...Aliens! Has anybody thought of that? I mean come on, 200 dogs and their overlord just up and disappear? People. Hasn't anyone been watching the 4400? "Taken for a Reason. Returned With A Purpose."
OK, so we're still working on the "returned" part, just cut us a little slack, what do you say Tillie? Whoa! Calm down girl! We can't print that in a family blog
Tillie takes baby steps in the right direction everyday. She has learned that toys are for playing and takes all of them into her crate by day's end. The other grey in the home waits for a chance and then drags them back out and takes them to her bed. She has started giving kisses and comes to the foster family when they call her name. Tillie can now go up and down stairs with ease. However, the family keeps the dogs primarily on the 1st floor, so she doesn't do it very often. Sometimes, when her foster mom is upstairs folding laundry or cleaning, Tillie will hear her footsteps and will come up to check things out. She is good on walks when people or other dogs approach, but when at home she barks at every strange noise she hears. The foster family thinks it may be because on walks, she knows Mom and Dad are there to protect her. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here.
But other dogs just "disappear," said greyhound activists, who fear unwanted dogs may have been euthanized. These fears have been underscored by the state's investigation into the alleged disappearance of 100 to 200 greyhounds that had recently left the track for Colorado.
In this case, the track contracted with a trainer in Colorado to move the dogs to various adoption agencies. The dogs were taken from the track by the Colorado trainer, but they were never delivered to adoption groups.
Oh. Umm...well...it's got to be some sort of misunderstanding. Let's see what the person transporting the dogs has to say.
The trainer has not returned calls.
Yeah. Uh...OK...Aliens! Has anybody thought of that? I mean come on, 200 dogs and their overlord just up and disappear? People. Hasn't anyone been watching the 4400? "Taken for a Reason. Returned With A Purpose."
OK, so we're still working on the "returned" part, just cut us a little slack, what do you say Tillie? Whoa! Calm down girl! We can't print that in a family blog
Tillie takes baby steps in the right direction everyday. She has learned that toys are for playing and takes all of them into her crate by day's end. The other grey in the home waits for a chance and then drags them back out and takes them to her bed. She has started giving kisses and comes to the foster family when they call her name. Tillie can now go up and down stairs with ease. However, the family keeps the dogs primarily on the 1st floor, so she doesn't do it very often. Sometimes, when her foster mom is upstairs folding laundry or cleaning, Tillie will hear her footsteps and will come up to check things out. She is good on walks when people or other dogs approach, but when at home she barks at every strange noise she hears. The foster family thinks it may be because on walks, she knows Mom and Dad are there to protect her. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here.
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