Thursday, July 12, 2012

Snoop Mitty Mitt

Hey, we learned something yesterday. The Mittbot's programmer sent him out to talk to a bunch of black folks and forgot to reprogram Panderprogram so he gave basically the same speech he gives to the mostly white crowds paid to show up at his regular appearances, and he got booed by the assembled brothers and sisters.

That's not the part where we learned anything though because come on, is there anyone whiter and more out of touch with any shade or hue not #FFFFFF and rich than Willard Richie MacWhite? No, it was after that when he was safe and sound back with his homies that we learned the thing we learned. See, he hightailed it right out of Houston, where he gave the speech, to the whitest state he could find on short notice--Montana where he said:
When I mentioned I am going to get rid of Obamacare, they weren't happy ... That's okay, I want people to know what I stand for, and if I don't stand for what they want, go vote for someone else, that's just fine. But I hope people understand this, your friends who like Obamacare, you remind them of this, if they want more stuff from the government, tell them to go vote for the other guy—more free stuff. But don’t forget nothing is really free.
 Now, what Mitt told his posse was he got right up in the grill of  people like this who are freeloading off the government and told them when his programmers finally get all the bugs out of his software that particular gravy train is going to come to a screeching halt. So, Tene Franklin, Genetic Counselor at Meharry Medical College, you better put down that 40 and start looking for a job. And you Benjamin S. Carson, Sr., Director of Pediatric Neurosurgery Co-Director of the Craniofacial Center Professor of Neurological Surgery, Oncology, Plastic Surgery and Pediatrics at Johns Hopkins Children's Center, you better quit using the want ads to wrap your blunts and start reading them. And you Oprah Winfrey you better stop giving cars away.

Man, when we found out that under Obamacare if you were an uninsured white or Hispanic woman looking for some preventative health care you couldn't get it because it was only going to blacks (and maybe only black NAACP members--we're still checking on that) well, let's just say our eyes were opened. When we found out that you could only stay on your parents insurance until you were 26 if you knew how to prepare collard greens, and couldn't be refused insurance for a preexisting condition only if you could recite the lyrics to Ghetto Dreams or Bad Girls Club it became obvious to us that this great nation is being dismantled and given away to undeserving, unappreciative freeloaders and only Mitt can save us.

Romney/Some Other White Bread Guy 2012!

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