Wednesday, November 10, 2010

And Moses Said Unto the Pharaoh, "Let My Parts Per Million Go"

You know, back when we elected Osamabama and  realized our life long goal of putting a Muslim socialist fascist Kenyan in the White House and finally bringing Sharia law to the US and forcing confederate southern Americans to gay marry aborted babies, we briefly considered closing this blog up.

Silly us.
A Republican congressman hoping to chair the powerful House Energy Committee refers to the Bible and God on the issue of global warming. Representative John Shimkus insists we shouldn't concerned about the planet being destroyed because God promised Noah it wouldn't happen again after the great flood.
OK, see here's the thing Shimkus: grown ups who have obtained responsible positions in the real world and thus are called upon to act in a logical and rational manner should not be believing in this stuff. Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, they all get dropped by the wayside before puberty, but invisible sky daddy, ruler of the universe with nothing better to do than meddle in the affairs of one dorky planet out in the boonies of the galaxy? Yeah, that's a keeper.
Speaking before a House Energy Subcommittee on Energy and Environment hearing in March, 2009, Shimkus quoted Chapter 8, Verse 22 of the Book of Genesis. He said: 'As long as the earth endures, seed time and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night, will never cease.'
Yeah, well that's the problem isn't it there Johnny boy, making sure the earth, you know, endures and all. You, um, grasping any of this?
The Illinois Republican continued: 'I believe that is the infallible word of God, and that's the way it is going to be for his creation.
Guess not. Hmm, well how about this: If god is going to handle all this anyway, why bother being on the House Energy Subcommittee on Energy and Environment? Why not just go sing a hymn, or play some golf? Buy an SUV.  You know, let Yahweh deal with it.
The Republican is a vocal opponent to President Obama's American Clean Energy and Security Act of 2009 - the so-called 'cap-and-trade' Bill, aimed at limiting carbon emissions.
Ah, we see. Now, we're not bible scholars or anything but we think we would have noticed the part where Jesus said unto the multitudes Thou shalt not cap and trade.
He added: 'Today we have about 388 parts per million in the atmosphere. I think in the age of dinosaurs, when we had the most flora and fauna, we were probably at 4,000 parts per million. There is a theological debate that this is a carbon-starved planet — not too much carbon. And the cost of a cap-and-trade on the poor is now being discovered.'
Yeah, the guy who believes a 2000 year old book full of self contradictions, additions and translations by innumerable individuals is the "infallible" word of god is now going to lecture us on paleoclimatological theology. You'll excuse us if we remain skeptical. Also confused. What kind of "theological" debate can you have about carbon? How many parts per million can you get on the head of a pin?
Shimkus, who has served on the committee since 1997, will likely be competing against Texas Representative Joe Barton and Michigan Congressman Fred Upton for the leadership.
Joe Barton and Fred Upton? Those are our choices? Cripes, where are the Pleiadians when you need them?

And one more thing: How come we had to read about this in a British paper? Were all the American reporters sitting in their offices waiting for a Tweet from Sarah Palin or something?

3 comments:

Seeing Eye Chick said...

The higher the oxygen content back in those "Dinosaur times" made larger bugs and contributed to other mega-fauna. I personally prefer that my black widows and mosquitoes are the size of vespa scooters. I think it makes my daily walks that much more interesting. This dipshit has made it abundantly clear, that he is part and parcel of the new religion of the Plutocrat and that would be Dominionism. Not to be confused with the villains on Star Trek Deep Space 9.

I wrote some stuff on this a while back. http://apocalyptictheocracy.blogspot.com/2008/10/christian-identity-conservative.html

James said...

I wish you were making this up. You're right that's sad it's only reported in a British paper.

scripto said...

"Representative John Shimkus insists we shouldn't concerned about the planet being destroyed because God promised Noah it wouldn't happen again after the great flood."

Shimkus (sounds Lithuanian American - I'm embarrassed for my people) needs read the fine print. the Big Guy is not going to destroy the planet by flood. He didn't say anything about shake and bake.