Do The Voices In My Head Get To Vote Too?

Ok, so maybe the president's poll numbers aren't exactly what one might call...er...favorable, if by favorable one means able to walk down a street in a medium to large city and not have rocks thrown at one, but just in case you are one of those people who think that things will get better as soon as the democrats take over, we bring you this little tale from the Yellowhammer state. Of course, any state that goes by a nickname like Yellowhammer, probably deserves what it gets.

A Democratic candidate for Alabama attorney general denies the Holocaust occurred and said Friday he will speak this weekend to a "pro-white" organization that is widely viewed as being racist. "We tried to find a pro-white group that wasn't racist," said a campaign aide. "But most of them were made up of Jews or Catholics."

Larry Darby concedes his views are idiotic, but he said they should help him win wide support among Alabama voters as he tries to "reawaken white racial awareness" with his campaign. "The Attorney General is in charge of the application of justice in the state," Darby told reporters. "And white guys are supposed to be in charge of stuff. It says that in the bible somewhere. Or maybe the Constitution."

"It's time to stop pushing down the white man. We've been discriminated against too long," Darby said in the interview. When asked to explain Darby said, "Look at Congress. A sea of white faces. Look at any medium to large police force. Mostly white faces. But look at any prison and what do you see? Mostly black and brown faces."

Several followup questions by reporters did not lead to a clarification of Darby's position. Finally he said, "Let me put it this way: "I am what rational people call a Holocaust denier, but I do not deny mass deaths that included some Jews," Darby said. "There was no systematic extermination of Jews in the camps the Jews were sent to be exterminated. There's no evidence of that at all on the web sites I read."

When asked how his views on racial discrimination against the white race, and his belief that there was no holocaust would impact his operation of the Attorney General's office Darby replied that it meant a fair trial to every "non Jew white male. "Justice has been blind too long," he said. "She needs to dang well pay attention to what the darkies are doing to my country."

When Darby was reminded that two of the top posts in the Bush administration, Attorney General and Secretary of State, were held by minorities he replied that "proves my point. We'd of never got into the Iraq mess if white guys had been in charge."

Darby also has publicly advocated legalizing drugs and shooting all illegal immigrants. "Well, I didn't say shoot to kill," Darby explained. "And I've been reevaluating my position on legalizing drugs since I found out that most of the drugs I take are prescription and probably legal."

Darby, founder of the Atheist Law Center and a longtime supporter of separation of church and state, said he has no money for campaign advertising and has made only a few campaign speeches. "Most of my supporters can't read, so they can't fill out the forms for bank accounts. I do get quite a few pigs and chickens though."