Clueless, Ignorant And Arrogant. Our Kind Of Guy.

You know, you have to hand it to Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfailed. First he botches the planning of the war, then he botches the supplying of the war, then he botches the occupation. After all that he has the stones to go to Iraq and tell the Iraqis "Anything that would delay that or disrupt the government as a result of turbulence or incompetence or corruption in government would be unfortunate."

The newly designated prime minister, Ibrahim al-Jaafari, told reporters, "I don't deny there are challenges, but I am sure we are going to form very good ministries," he said, "we're taking everything the Americans tell us and doing the opposite."

In a joint appearance before reporters, Rumsfailed and interim President Jalal Talabani struggled to make themselves understood to a mixed Iraqi-American press corps. At one point Talabani translated for Rumsfailed as the defense secretary fielded a question from an Iraqi speaking in Arabic. After hearing Talabani's version of the question, Rumsfailed accused the reporter of phrasing it inaccurately, "There's no way he called me a pompous, empty headed gas bag," the Secretary was heard to say, "Look at him, he doesn't look like he's had more than an eighth grade education."

"You are quite correct," Talabani replied, "I did paraphrase his comments somewhat. His exact words were 'you feces ridden bloviating dung worm.'"

Rumsfailed told reporters he would press the new Iraqi leadership to avoid delays on either the political or security front. "It's important that the new government be attentive to the competence of the people in the ministries and that they avoid unnecessary turbulence," Rumsfailed said. "Jesus I can't believe I said that with a straight face, he continued. "Isn't irony just the greatest thing? How come they're not laughing? Oh. Forgot. They don't speak English. Well, you tell the jokes you have, not the ones you wish you had."