Monday, November 30, 2009

Catholic Church! Motto: Leading The Way To Irrelevancy In The 21st Century

Well, if this doesn't just dominus your vobiscum. It seems certain muckity mucks in the church catholic are a bit peeved at Patrick Kennedy because he had the temerity to suggest that women should have some say so in the use of their bodies.

Where do people get crazy ideas like that, Bishop Tobin?

Bishop Thomas Tobin, the Roman Catholic leader of Rhode Island, confirmed he had asked Kennedy, a congressman for the north-eastern state, to refrain from taking Holy Communion because of his support for abortion. "Now, I want to make very clear that we're still happy to take his money," Bishop Tobin said. "But when it comes to holy snack time, NO HOST FOR YOU!"

OK, before we go on we'd just like to say that we do recognize the potential for a bunch of jokes concerning the whole Kennedy family and the use of women's bodies, but it's Monday after a holiday and we're a little ragged around the edges, so you want Kennedy jokes, be our guest. Now, back to our story:

Tobin defended his stand against Kennedy, saying in a statement on his website that he "sought to provide solely for his spiritual well-being."

Darn Straight. We mean, the church is all about moral guidance and spiritual well being. Isn't that so Tom Sweeney, Mannix Flynn and Christine Buckley?

A 2,600-page report, published Wednesday following a nine-year probe into child abuse by Ireland's fading Catholic religious orders, painted a damning portrait of a system that protected child-molesting church officials while consigning generations of Ireland's poorest children to misery. The five-volume report on the probe — which was resisted by Catholic religious orders — concluded that church officials shielded their orders' pedophiles from arrest amid a culture of self-serving secrecy.

Right. Because children are the most vulnerable and most in need of protection and safety from...wait, what was that?

"A climate of fear, created by pervasive, excessive and arbitrary punishment, permeated most of the institutions and all those run for boys. Children lived with the daily terror of not knowing where the next beating was coming from," Ireland's Commission to Inquire Into Child Abuse concluded.

Oh. Well...uh...OK. Hey, kids are resilient, right? It's that whole being young thing. They get over it. But poor people, now there's where the church can really shine. What you do for the least of my brethren and all that, right?

The Catholic Archdiocese of Washington said it will be unable to continue the social service programs it runs for the District if the city doesn't change a proposed same-sex marriage law, a threat that could affect tens of thousands of people the church helps with adoption, homelessness and health care.

Look, it's a matter of making the best use of limited resources. Most of these people are going to hell anyway, and that Kennedy guy will be leading the way, so what do you want from us? Consistency?

Malus bonum ubi se simulat, tunc est pessimus.1

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

First off, one of my best friends from French Summer School was named Deborah Tobin. She was the most Jewish, vulgar and hilarious woman I ever knew! So, I don't know where this "Bishop Tobin" comes from, but let's roll with the ball.
Now, I know the Kennedy men can be "extra special" because let's face it, they mostly are. However, there was a daughter from Robert Kennedy ,I do believe, that married "someone special" from Ireland and she had a whole lot to say about the perverse of the Catholic Church. (and she did not solely speak of Ireland when she spoke it)
Now, as for Patrick Kennedy being on the side of women who want an abortion, I mean, who is the enemy?
Is the enemy a guy who demands a woman have an abortion so she can become an alcoholic just thinking of the years ahead with a child she does not want and would probably destroy the unborn baby while boozing up during pregnancy, anyway?
Is the enemy the guy who understands that some women do not even dream of becoming Mothers because they do not have the time or the finances or the desire to become one?
Is the enemy some Politician who understands women do not want to be farmed out like cattle or even Greyhounds?
Or is the enemy the tiny, ignorant, ball-busting, religious fanatic who just DARE women to even TRY to use their rights for their own bodies? They just SCREAM masculine authority for the sake of masculine authority because , after all, men have always ruled for centuries and they are not willing to let women have their hold on societies once again. Oh no! NEVER! Because what will certainly happen then, is that like Sweden and all the rest of the Netherlands, not to mention France and Canada and mostly intelligent Nations, that truly do believe in women and their intelligence and their God -given ways of enforcing child-care, and motherhood and stabilization of home life, not to mention all the government assistance that goes along with it such as child care and insurance, etc, etc. etc., the" Bishop Tobins" and all the Catholic and Right Wing Fanatics will go by the wayside and be booted out of existence! Oh yes they would! And they know we women are dying for just that to happen, so perhaps these old fashioned, nobodies left over from days gone by might re-think their "options". Women have surpassed you. And we refuse to go back. So, have your "Hosts", Bishop Tobin. You don't scare us. We 'll just leave.

Anonymous said...

I resent very much the fact that women already "won" the right to have their own bodies BE their own bodies!
Honest to CHRIST! We women are FED UP!
Roe vs Wade happened more than thirty years ago and all the tremendous women like Gloria Steinem HELPED US, THE WOMEN, define our OWN agendas, FINALLY!
When "men" can say that you get knocked up, your problem, when THEY are the ones knocking us up, ENOUGH!
Not only that, we are sick to DEATH. and literally, of all the DESPERATION, poorer women, form ALL societies , are thrown to the wind with back alley abortions when insurance refuses to pay. You call that a loving society ending up butchered on the street with illegal abortions?
If men are going to even pretend to care, and be PAID to do it, they sure as HELL better follow the line. We women are just as important as men, and when you deny US of our own RIGHTS, you shall definitely pay. Without the vote. Without the respect. Without anything whatsoever. In short, you can go back out on the street, without a paycheck. And "good luck".
One of my favorite sayings has always been from Gloria Steinem. I believe it was she who did state:
"If men could get pregnant, abortions would be a sacrament".
She and others like her paved our way.
AMEN!

Seeing Eye Chick said...

I am so glad I am not a Christian. Thank you Jesus for helping me see the light---that emits from the Crotch area of the wannable Righteous boy and girl rapers, who think that I--Sin more when I consider my body something that I exclusively control as a matter of personal sovereignty.

While I am glad that Ireland has done all this research let us not forget the Magdelen Laundries. Let us not forget Boarding Schools for indigenous children in America and in Australia where they were beaten if they were caught acting in a traditional way or speaking their own language, and often raped as a matter of course. Let us not forget that the Catholic church has been the butt of every pederasty/pedophilia joke since like the Dark Ages.

I mean who are we fooling here? How could we not know the best kept pedophilic secret in the whole freaken solar system?

Thank you Jesus for not making me a Christian and especially for not making me a Catholic.

As for the right to choose. I hold that right in reserve. The Catholics and the Tea baggers can bitch and moan, but ultimately I will win. I know more about my body and its processes than they do, me being able to actually read and all.

Anonymous said...

Hey you F--king katholickass prelate, Maybe Mr. Kennedy will give up his support for women when your f--king priests stop raping little boys and getting away with it because your fu-king church covers it up, and moves priests around so that the law can't prosecute them. F- the katholickass church, you piece of shite!