Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Let's Get Some Serious Rendering Unto Caesar Up In Here

Holy crap! The fuzz busted one of Ratzi's crew. Well, the fuzz in Belgium. Is that even a country? We thought it was a suburb of France. Or Latvia. Anyway, we here at IM Central applaud this brave act by the men and women of law enforcement--which of course condemns them to an eternity in the fiery pit. Or Alabama. Same diff.

And you best be laying in a supply of that asbestos underwear pretty soon there Belgium, because we're betting the popester is about to thump his pope stick three times,  mumbo the magic jumbo and drop a dime on your scrawny crime and punishment buttocks. Are we right Father Prada?
Pope Benedict XVI accused Belgian police of "deplorable methods" in raiding a bishops' meeting as part of a paedophilia probe.
"Deplorable." That's holy code for "Hope you like locusts." In fact we're a little surprised Big Dog...er...excuse us. Canis Maximus. We read somewhere that the pope always addresses the boss in Latin. Kind of  makes explaining why the troops won't stop boinking the altar boys a little less, you know, perverted. Anyway, we were saying we were kind of wondering why Canis Maximus hasn't unleashed some serious wrath on these semi-French, baguette eating heathens already. We're sure the pope has been all like, "Dude, can't you do something about those peckerheads?"
"I want to express... my closeness and solidarity in this moment of sadness, in which, with certain surprising and deplorable methods, searches were carried out including in the Mechelen cathedral and in the premises where the Belgian episcopate was meeting in plenary session," the pope said.
 "Meeting in plenary session," huh? So that's what the padres are calling it these days. Also didn't know the Mechelen cathedral was clothing optional.

Well, we'd just like to say that if you live in Belgium, or, since his omnipotence seems a trifle near sighted, anywhere in Europe, we'd suggest a visit to your long lost uncle Pierre in Australia because when old Yaweh gets his smite on it's Katy bar the door and hide the good silverware.

Good thing nothing like that could happen in this country. Over here it's like a get out of jail free card if you flock with Peter's gang. Almost wrote that wrong, but the point is in America  NAMBLA is fine as long as there a Father in front of it. Wait, what?
The U.S. Supreme Court refused to consider a case on whether the Vatican has immunity over the sexual abuse of minors by priests, allowing a lawsuit filed in 2002 to go forward.

Crap, crap and double crap. Hey uncle Pierre, you got any space left in the guestroom?

3 comments:

scripto said...

Wonder if they scoped the Sacristy with a black light?

scripto said...

Seems a little excessive to me. If the Belgian police needed DNA evidence they could just scrape an altar boy.

Anonymous said...

At the very least, the Belgian police stuck it to these pervs! Enough with the little boys and the little girls!
Enough with the deaf children!
When the police stuck a tv camera into the crypts of these old, criminally involved Bishops, they universally joined hands with billions in trying to get evidence against pedophiles.
If this is not "saintly", you tell me what is!