Thursday, June 05, 2014

Friday Hound Blogging (Thursday Edition)

Frequent reader(s) of this blog know that the one constant in this life is decline...erm...we mean know that above all else we strive for egalitie here in the marbled halls of IM Central, along with libertie and fraternite which is pretty much all we remember from Mrs. LePage's 11th grade French class, except for the week we spent learning to say "ne 'on veut sortir avec moi," which we then tried on Elizabeth Arlen in the hopes that we could impress her with our European suaveity. She instantly replied "Jamais de la vie perdant," which sent us excitedly back to our French to English dictionary...and then to the local grocery for our favorite comfort food, RC Cola and a package of Snowballs.

What was our point? Oh yeah, egalitie--equality, balance, fairness. Our rumination along these lines--aside from reviving an unfortunate high school memory--brought us to the realization that since we were late with our usual FHB last week, being early this week would restore the stars to their proper orbits, the seasons to their proper balance, and America to the nation it once was, instead of a fever swamp populated by creatures with small minds and even smaller hearts.

OK that last one may be a bit much to hope for. Apparently endless war tends to bruise one's humanity--permanently. And speaking of bruised humanity (Segues. Gotta love 'em) let's head down to Tucson Deathcamp for Greyhounds and check on the superior level of care and support the units...erm...the highly trained athletes,who are the beneficiaries of large investments of time and money, are receiving today.
Record heat in Tucson Monday led to some questions about whether it was safe for greyhounds to race.
Now, frankly we're surprised that this is even still an issue because a few years ago, roustabout scientist and friend of the blog Rory Goree put this whole issue to rest by walking around the track on a hot day in his bare feet. So, overfed, undereducated, middle aged doofis strolling around the track on a hot day, sweating from every pore on his body equals greyhounds running flat out with only panting to cool themselves. It's science people. You can't argue with facts.
Tucson Greyhound Park would not comment Monday.  But the Arizona Department of Racing listed several reasons why racing could continue.
"Well, the biggest reason is if they don't race they don't make money," said Bill Walsh, Director of the Arizona Department of Racing. "Of course when they do race they don't make money either," he added, "So I guess they have to race, but racing isn't profitable, so if they didn't race everyone would be better off, especially the dogs, but by racing they don't make money and the dogs are put at risk, but they need to make money so they keep racing which doesn't make them any money. I've lost my train of thought."

Oh that train's not lost Billy boy, it's lying in a smouldering heap down at the bottom of the ravine.
"Give the dogs a break, for gosh sakes, if the ADOR cared, they'd issue this edict themselves but that's what I would prefer the track do, show that they do have a little bit of concern for the dogs' well-being," said Ward 6 Tucson City Council member Steve Kozachik.
Hey come on Mr. Kozachik, haven't you been listening? They need to race, which doesn't make money, so racing is the only way they can make money. We can't make it more clear than that, right Dahlia?

Dahlia is an eight year old brindle female who likes cats and small dogs, but could also be an only dog. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

1 comment:

Nancy said...

While I may get confused on which day it is with FHB (darn, have to work tomorrow), I welcome all of these.

Great!!! As always.