Friday Hound Blogging

Frequent reader(s) of this blog know the secret to happiness is lowered expectations...erm...we mean know that we have often taken the overlords to task for their dysfunctional relationship with the maths  so when we ran across their latest expectoration and noticed that they had graduated from an inability to figure percentages to trying their hand at the expurgation of statistical data we were intrigued.

The first thing we noticed is that the little overlord missive is published by an organization called PRWeb which apparently is a site that, for a fee, will post your press release. Sort of like a blog, except you have to pay them (note to self: find people who are desperate enough to send us money to post things on our blog). We also noticed that of the four people shown in the pair of photos on the PRWeb site, two appear in both, which leads us to believe that the PRWeb enterprise is located in someone's basement, but leave that be, it doesn't matter right now.

In an effort to be fair--or maybe just to find another reason to laugh at the overlords' attempt at refutation--we thought we'd do a search to see if any media outlets had picked up the press release. After all, thinks us, greyhounds are big in the news right now, especially in Florida and  just because the overlords paid to get someone to listen to them, doesn't mean they don't have something of value to say yes it does we're just fooling with you. Anyway, our search turned up two responses: zip and nada.  No newspapers. No tee vee. No radio. No leaflets put under the windshield wipers of the cars in the local Walmart. Nothing. Bupkus. Well, unless you count the postings on the overlords' own sites then yeah, it's all over the web, but really folks, that's sort of informational masturbation don't you think? Little icky.

So what could be the problem? The topic is certainly newsworthy as it's been all over the papers and local tee vee stations. We decided to take a closer look.

Live attendance and wagering at Florida’s greyhound race tracks are experiencing steady growth, according to the Florida Division of Pari-mutuel Wagering reports that live betting (handle) was up 11.4% state wide in November, with a handful of tracks performing well above the state average.

 OK, not to be picky or anything but when you say "steady" that means, well, steady, as in over time. So if the November handle was "up," what was it up compared to? October? The previous November? Since you threw a buck fifty in the till? Not very enlightening, but what else you got?

The state’s Gambling Impact Study reports that the Florida greyhound industry produces an estimated $ 200 million dollars in tax revenue.

Oh overlords! You're so cute when you try to be rational. We believe that when the heartless exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit finally goes the way of New Coke and the AMC Gremlin there will be a career for you picking cherries. It's true the report said what you quoted, but it also said:

Greyhound racing is a “dying sport” that has been hemorrhaging revenue for years, according to a study of commissioned by the Florida Legislature.

More specifically:

The first 307-page report, released last week, gave an overview of all aspects of the state’s gaming industry, but painted a particularly bleak picture for facilities that offer greyhound racing. “Handle,” or the total amount wagered, has plummeted over the past two decades. “Total handle for the 13 facilities that ran greyhound racing fell from $933.8 million in [fiscal year] 1990 to $265.4 million in [fiscal year] 2012, a decline of 67 percent,” the report read.

 See the difference here overlords? Your "up" isn't connected to anything, but the report's down is connected to years. Twenty. Two. Years. Now there's a steady for you Bucko. Twenty-two years and nothing but drop. Don't get much steadier than that. We'll give you one more chance though. What's your big finish?

Reports of greyhound racing’s declining profitability are often one sided and purposely do not take into account that a number of tracks have closed in the past twenty years. In 1993, there were 18 greyhound tracks operating in Florida. Today, there are 13. The smaller industry pool in 2013 versus 1993 naturally shows a decline.

 Well sure, if by "decline" you mean the number of tracks, but we're talking dollars here dude. So if you have less tracks chasing the same, or greater, amount of bucks, shouldn't each track's take have been increasing rather than decreasing over the years? You know, the less people that want a piece of the pie, the bigger each person's piece is. Sorry to lay the heavy duty statistical vocab on you there Mr. Overlord sir, but it looks like your statistical analysis skills could use...some...well...statistical analysis skills, right Valentino?

Handsome young beefcake new in town looking for love. Not set in my ways yet, I am very flexible! Nothing but time on my paws since I officially have no plans to be gainfully employed. Looking for that comfy couch and someone to snuggle. Call me! For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.