Friday, July 24, 2015

Friday Hound Blogging

OK, it's pop quiz time here in the marbled halls of IM Central. Complete this sentence:
In the future, the state’s thoroughbred and greyhound racing industries could feature:
Here are your choices:

A. Lectures by Veterinarians on the physical harm that can occur to racing animals.

B. A chapter of Gamblers Anonymous.

C. Workshops on the ethical aspects of commodifying sentient living creatures solely for profit.

D. Career counseling for the overlords.

Done? OK let's see what you picked.
Off-track betting at upscale sports bars and, perhaps, country clubs around the state.

Racetrack-sponsored social gaming sites with prizes, such as free hotel
accommodations, redeemable at the racetracks.

More flexibility for the state Racing Commission to reduce or increase racing days at the state’s four tracks, based on fluctuations in purse fund revenues.

Legalized sports betting at the racetracks.
 Hmmm...not quite what we were looking for, but we see your point. Anything that takes the emphasis away from racing is likely to help racing. You might be on to something here. Care to elaborate Racing Commissioner Bill Phillips?
“What it points out to me is people in this industry are willing to sit down and work together to stimulate and grow the industry,” he said Tuesday, after subcommittees presented their ideas for revamping racing in the state.
Gotcha. So the thing to do to stimulate and grow the industry is to give people things to do other than watch innocent animals risk life and limb for losers betting the rent money. Sounds like a plan.
Proposals for economic growth and revenue enhancement ranged from the more conventional -- such as advanced deposit wagering, which allows players to set up accounts so they can place wagers from their smartphones or tablets – to the extreme of legalizing sports betting at the racetracks. It  was brought up as something that obviously would be a game-changer,” Erich Zimny, vice president of racing operations at Charles Town Races, said of the latter. “How realistic that is, is another question.”
Oh we're with you there, Mr. Zimmy. Anyone dumb enough to think they are going to make money betting on whether an animal will get around the track without killing or injuring itself is probably not going to be too adept at operating a smart phone or a tablet. In fact, if they even have a tablet it's probably the kind the doctor prescribed for them, you know...so they'd stop hearing the voices. Besides, even Sam Burdette figured out that losers bet and bettors lose and he's not exactly Stephen Hawking's long lost brother, know what we're saying?
Phil Reale, who lobbies for both thoroughbred and greyhound owners, suggested that OTB would work well in sports bars and country clubs. “Upscale sports bars are an absolute home run,” he said, adding, “It’s the kind of clientele you’re looking for.”
Well, we can certainly understand that Mr. Reale, but we have to say upscale and the wholesale exploitation of innocent living creatures for (no) profit are not ideas that are usually connected. And country clubs? Seriously? "Jerry, here are my keys. Pull the Mercedes around while I bet two bucks on some poor, helpless dog in Florida will you? I'm meeting with my broker at two."

We're just not seeing it.
Also suggested were racetrack-sponsored social gaming sites, with winning prizes redeemable at the racetracks, as a way to entice Millennials to visit the facilities.
 OK we can see that, but what kind of prize would you offer? It's not exactly like you're in a position to be giving away cars and stuff. Oh we know! How about something like the collar from a dog that electrocuted itself during a race. It's not going to cost anything and it might make a nice memento for whomever bet on the deceased unit.
Among marketing and advertising proposals was a suggestion to promote racetrack casinos not only as entertainment venues, but also as major employers and economic engines in their regions.
Hey, we like that. We can see it now...billboards all around the state: "Visit your local race track so the poor schmucks who work the minimum wage no benefit jobs don't have to go on welfare." That's bound to bring them in, right Sue?


I am very puppyish and have a lot of energy for being almost three years old. I am curious about everything as it is all new to me. I love to follow my foster parents around and I like to see what they are doing. I love to look at myself in the mirror and see how beautiful I am. I do a little “happy dance” when my foster parents get home.

I learned how to go up and down the stairs my first day in my foster home. I am housebroken. I need some work learning how to walk on a leash. I get along with dogs of all sizes. I have loved all of the new people I have met. I am learning how to play with toys. For more information about this dog, and other rescued racing greyhounds looking for homes, go here. If you don't know about the plight of racing greyhounds go here and here.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Admittedly, legislators aren't the smartest bunch around. But most of them can figure out that greyhound and horse racing aren't abusive. Most rational folks can figure that out, as well. As for the extremists, like yourself and your handlers at Grey2k Profit Central, most can see you for what you are - ranting lunatics.

Ironicus Maximus said...

"Admittedly, legislators aren't the smartest bunch around. But most of them can figure out that greyhound and horse racing aren't abusive. Most rational folks can figure that out, as well."

Yeah. That's why they're such thriving businesses, huh Bobby?

Unknown said...

Come on, Freddie, nobody's holding a knife to their throats. If they don't want to be in the business of operating a greyhound race track all they have to do is surrender their pari-mutuel license.